forehead creased as if she couldn't believe his question. "Why am I here, Ash? Is that what you're saying to Not Millie's belly? I wasn't sure. I can't hear you on account of the belly mumbling."
"Her name is Zelda and you're being a pain in the fucking ass right now, Magnolia," he replied. All rumbles, all grumbles.
"Right, yeah, you're also being a pain in my fucking ass," she said. "You're getting fitted for your suit today. Remember? Remember how this was the only day in your extremely busy schedule and it's the absolute last minute the tailor could squeeze you in and guarantee the alterations for the wedding? And Mom and I said we'd pick you up and take you there ourselves because we didn't trust you wouldn't fall down a work hole and forget. Because you tend to forget things when they don't involve your primary interests of work and more work, Ash."
One more groan. One more grumble. And then— "Fuck."
He rolled away from me, hissing with pain as the injured side of his body met the mattress. "Don't do that," I warned, slipping my arm around his shoulders. "Here. Let me help you up."
"Not to be annoying or anything but is anyone going to explain to me what happened?" Magnolia asked. "What's the sling all about?"
I scrambled to my knees to support Ash's exit from the bed. When his feet hit the floor, he turned to face me. I'd noticed the erection against my leg. Of course I did. One couldn't ignore that sort of thing. But seeing it barely restrained behind a thin pair of boxers was an entirely different experience.
"Oh my god. Put the wood away, dude," Magnolia said, sighing. She pressed her hand to her forehead, shielding her eyes. "You're scaring Not Millie."
He patted my head like I was a puppy and turned away, crossing the room. Over his shoulder he called, "I told you, Magnolia. Enough with that Not Millie shit. It's Zelda. Get it right or get the fuck out."
Not bothering to close the door when he entered the adjoining bathroom, Ash started and stopped the taps, brushed his teeth, and flipped the toilet lid open. Magnolia and I stared at each other while Ash relieved himself. How fortunate was I to witness that event twice in a matter of hours?
"Hi," she said with a wave. "I'm Magnolia."
"Zelda," I replied, still kneeling on the bed. "But I think you heard that already."
"Oh, I did." Her dark eyes glittered. "My brother never once snapped at me about Millie."
The toilet flushed and Ash called, "Stop. Talking. Now."
I pointed toward the bathroom. "He had a rough day. Yesterday."
She gave me an incredulous look. "You think? His arm is in a sling, he's bruised to shit, and—while you seem delightful—you are not the woman I expected to find in my brother's bed on a Saturday morning."
The door banged shut behind him and Ash said, "Magnolia, I told you—"
"What on earth? Why on earth is there luggage in the foyer like this?"
All heads swiveled in the direction of the hallway.
"I told you she was coming," Magnolia whispered.
Ash pressed his hand to his forehead, kneaded his temple. "And I told you to stop talking," he said. "I have the worst fucking headache and I swear to god, I'm going to stab myself in the arm."
"Don't stab yourself. I'm not taking you back to urgent care today. They'll think I'm abusing you." I crawled out of bed and fumbled for the prescription bottle on the bedside table. I dropped a tablet into my palm and held it out to him. "Take this."
He downed the tablet and leaned against me, his good arm around my shoulders. If I lived to be three hundred years old, I'd never understand how anyone could swallow pills dry. "I'd tell them you're not beating me," he said, resting his forehead against the crown of my head.
"I'd appreciate that," I replied, more than aware Ash's sister was watching us with rapt attention and his mother was a moment or two away. "Any chance you could tell me who Millie is?"
"No one," he whispered.
It seemed like an answer with too much simplicity, considering his sister was dead set on the belief Millie would be the woman in his bed. Yet I replied, "Okay."
"Any chance there are some over-easy eggs and home fries in my future? Can you make that happen too?"
"Is that what it's going to take to get you ready to roll for this suit fitting?"