The Bookworm's Guide to Faking (The Bookworm's Guide #2) - Emma Hart Page 0,70
I don’t feel the need to be a real one.” I followed him with my gaze as he turned off the stove and came in my direction.
“You’re in front of the pasta,” he said without batting an eyelid.
I sidestepped. “Not with this kitchen. Only a madwoman would date a man with a kitchen this insane. Who knew such pretty cabinets held such insanity?”
He pulled the lasagna sheets out, not even bothering to hide his amusement again.
“This is a whole other level. Completely crazy. I don’t know how you fi—” I was cut off when he slammed the cabinet door shut.
He shoved the pasta box on the counter so hard I thought I heard a few of the sheets break, but that was nothing more than a fleeting thought as he yanked me against him, cupped the back of my neck, and kissed me.
Every single nerve ending in my body felt like it was on fire.
I squeaked under his touch, but he didn’t relent. His other hand slid up my arm and over my shoulder to cup my face, keeping me in place. Any resistance I had deflated out of me like a balloon, and I rested my hands on his forearms.
It…
It was the best kiss I’d ever had.
The kind of kiss I’d read about a thousand times. The one designed to shut you up. The one designed to put an end to any and all doubt about feelings.
The one that kicked you in the soul and imprinted itself there.
I leaned into it, unable to ignore the way my heart was pounding in my chest.
This had been building all day. I’d known it was coming, and I was both happy and wary that it had.
Because I knew.
There was nothing residual about my feelings for Sebastian Stone. Nothing left over from our high school days, from the lack of closure I’d had.
What I felt for him was very, very real, and I could no longer hide behind a curtain of denial and snarky comments to keep him at arm’s length.
“Thank God for that,” he murmured, pulling away. “I had to shut you up somehow.”
Opening my eyes, I looked up at him through my lashes. There was a light in his eyes, one that hadn’t been there five minutes ago. One that warmed me all through my body and sent a spark of surrender through me.
And fear.
So much fear.
Beyond everything, I was deathly afraid of being hurt. Sebastian was the only person who could hurt me in the way I feared so badly, and I knew that because it’d happened once before. While I knew that hadn’t been intentional and my own stubborn ass had been to blame, that didn’t change the fact I was terrified.
I’d always been afraid of falling.
Out of bed.
From a tree.
In love.
“Is it just old feelings?” I asked softly, inhaling slowly. “Because we never sorted it back then? Is this all nostalgia?”
Slowly, his smile fell, and his lips turned downward, but that light in his blue eyes never left. “No,” he replied after a moment of searching my face. “Not for me. It never has been. I was in love with you, Holley, and I’m not sure I ever got over you.”
I swallowed, sliding my hands down his arms.
“Is it for you? Just something that could have been?”
“No. But I don’t know what to say. I don’t have the words.”
“Ironic, considering how many you read each day.”
I fought a smile. “I don’t want to fight with you anymore.”
He drew me closer to him and dipped his head, brushing his nose over mine. “Then let me in, Hol. Just stop fighting and see what happens.”
“But what about when you leave again? To play again?”
He sighed. “It was a bad tear,” he said in a low voice. “Everyone is happy with my progress, but they told me this week there’s a seventy-five-percent chance I’ll never play professionally again.”
My stomach dropped. “What?”
“Yeah. It’s not uncommon for a torn rotator cuff to end a career, but I’d hoped I’d be a few years older before I had that particular conversation with my doctor. It’s why Dylan is really moving nearby. His job is to try and change those odds up.” His eyes never left mine. “But I’m not going to pin my entire life on a twenty-five-percent chance when I know I’ll never be the same player I was before. It’s not like it’s a pulled muscle where you’re fine after a couple of weeks.”