the booze away, lining it up at the till by the exit. It only took a minute for Nic to distract the cashier into frozen foods and I was reaching over and grabbing what I could. Talk about an electric buzz! Seconds later I was running down the street, my rubber soles slapping on the cobbles. I don’t know why I thought I was being chased, but I only stopped when Nic was by my side.
‘For a Lard-Arse you can’t half run,’ she laughed.
Then she grabbed my Instamatic out of my pocket.
‘This is a historic moment – your first criminal act! Say: “Screwdriver! ”’
Perhaps I’m not that happy in the picture after all. I remember wondering if the photo was evidence. But there wasn’t much time for thinking. Nic was running ahead as per always, and I was trying to catch up. A couple of cars beeped their horns as we zig-zagged across the Esplanade. Nic flashed her knickers in reply. We skirted round the harbour and I looked down along the jetties to where our boat used to be moored.
Nic followed my eyes. ‘What you looking for?’
‘Nothing,’ I replied, tripping over my feet.
We were halfway to the breakwater when Nic climbed over the railings and smiled back at me. I warned her she might fall. The wind was whipping up her hair so it looked like she was underwater already.
‘Hold my hand,’ she said, reaching out.
I took it and held on as tightly as I could, and she swung away and carried on walking, still on the wrong side of the railings with the water right under her feet.
I used all my weight to keep her upright.
Nic was always doing things like that. Silly little things to catch everyone’s eye. I don’t know why she was such an attention-seeker, but she hated me telling her off.
‘What do you know? You’ve lived your whole life in your fucking bedroom,’ she’d say. ‘What’s the point in playing it safe?!’
Maybe that’s why people weren’t surprised when she ended up dead. They also knew she’d been drinking. We both drank too much, but being with Nic was like being drunk already. It made everything blurry and therefore good.
I felt guilty after I stole that bottle of gin, but it’s nothing compared to how I feel now. Nic’s dead and I killed her, and who can I tell? Not Constable Priaulx, that’s for sure. He came round here two days after they found Nic’s lovely corpse. It was still blowing a gale outside and I was huddled close to the fire, hoping my polyester fleece would spontaneously combust. I was still in shock and I honestly thought he’d arrest me there and then, but he called it a Routine Inquiry. Of course, that’s all anything ever is for Constable Piggy, since he’s far more interested in eating than solving possible murders. He thinks that Guernsey is the safest place on the planet. He thinks Nic’s death was an accident. I was all ready with my big confession. I was going to tell him the-truth-the-whole-truth-and-nothing-but-the-truth. But I never got the chance.
‘We’ve heard the news and it’s just awful,’ said Mum, ushering him into the sitting room. ‘The poor, poor parents, my heart goes out to them. Who would think that something like that could happen? I really don’t know what to say, and there’s probably not much we can tell you, since we only just found out ourselves.’
Constable Priaulx rearranged his tummy folds and sank into our sofa.
‘It’s terrible, I know. I was wondering if Cathy had seen Nicolette on the Saturday.’
‘We both did.’ Mum wouldn’t look at me. ‘Nicolette came here at about 5 p.m., she was keen for Cathy to go to the party over at Vicky’s, but Cathy said she wasn’t up to it. We’ve both been under the weather.’
I sat there, waiting for the handcuffs, for Constable Priaulx to see the guilt all over my face.
‘I’ve had a cold myself,’ he shook his head and sighed. ‘Who’d want to go out on such a wild night? There’ll have to be an inquiry as to whether there should be barriers up around the cliff edge at the Batterie.’
Mum shook her head.
‘And nobody saw a thing?’
‘No, no,’ sighed Constable Fathead. ‘After Dr Senner closed the party down a group of them went to Bluebell Woods with what was left of the alcohol. Nicolette must’ve wandered off. It’s unclear what she was up to.’
I remembered how Nic ran at me from the shadows and