Bonds of Brass (The Bloodright Trilogy #1) - Emily Skrutskie Page 0,40
to think it over—it was a lot to process, and it all happened so fast. What happened between then and now?”
I have absolutely no idea what to do with my hands, but they’re starting to shake. “I thought it over. I realized it’s stupid—it’s so stupid—”
“It’s not,” he murmurs, lunging suddenly forward, but he pulls up short when he sees the way I tense. His wide brown eyes bore deep into mine, and there’s something about the half-light that makes them a thousand times more intense. “Ettian, I have so little time left to make my own choices. I want to do everything I can to make the most of it.”
I suppress a shiver, forcing myself to hold his gaze. My hands curl into fists at my sides. “And when your time is up, you want to leave me like this?”
“I won’t leave you,” he swears with a fierce shake of his head.
I wish I could believe that. I don’t tell him how badly I wish for it—I’m afraid if the words leave my mouth, I’ll somehow fool myself into thinking we could make this work. “You will,” I mutter. “You have to. You should.”
“I’m the Umber heir,” Gal protests. “I can make a place for you. There’s always going to be a place for you at my side.”
“As what, your consort?”
“Don’t be crass.”
“Your chauffeur?”
“Ettian.”
“Your pressure point?”
And that gets him. His eyes dart guiltily away as the blow registers, his lips twisting in a scowl. He knows the games imperials play. Gal’s whole life has been spent in hiding to keep him from being used by power-hungry system governors. He’s already dragged me into enough of his mess, but if it got out that the Umber heir had given his heart to some kid from the former Archon Empire, I’d be the target of every single knife the governors might want to bury in his back. Swinging for a prince might have serious consequences, but nobody gives a shit about Ettian Nassun.
Nobody except Gal, who’s looking at me again in a way I can’t stand. “It might be my last chance to have something real,” he whispers, and I feel like my heart’s being pulled out of my throat.
We have to kill this thing before it’s too late.
I shake my head, dropping my gaze to the poor scorched plants withering in the sand. “It can’t work,” I mutter, hating every breath of the truth that slips between my teeth. “It’s better like this.”
There’s a long pause, filled only by the soft chatter of the distant river and the hum of insects awakening in the twilight. Gal looks around helplessly, hugging his arms to his chest and hunching in a way that makes him look even smaller. “But you’re still…with me, right?” he finally asks.
Part of me wants to fire the snappy retort trying to force itself from my lungs, but I bite down on it. “Yeah, of course. Always.”
“Well, not always,” Gal points out.
“Fine—until we reach the Seat. Until then, I’ve always got your back.”
He flashes a weary smile, and I hate that it’s enough. “I…scraped most of the paint off a ship, and my arms are about to fall off.”
“You know, I would have taken a turn, but…”
He rolls his eyes, starting up the Ruttin’ Hell’s ramp at an unsteady gait. “We have to get moving bright and early tomorrow. Dawn at the latest.”
I nod but don’t follow. As he disappears into the dark of the ship, I tip my head back, staring up at the unfamiliar stars of this system. Even though I feel a yawning, terrible ache in my chest, there’s a thread of giddiness trying to sew it shut that brings a soft smile out of the corners of my lips. I wasn’t making it up. There was something there. Something mutual. Something that has to end, but it was real.
When I finally make my way to bed, I find Gal’s taken the top bunk.