Bohdi (King's Descendants MC #6) - Bella Jewel Page 0,19
long time, but the idea of him dying for us ... knowing that he was killed because of me, I don’t know if my conscience is okay with that.
I’m not a monster.
I’m not sure taking someone from this life is how I’d deal with things.
I know the club works differently.
“Does Cova know?” I ask softly.
“No,” Briella answers. “We never told her, we just took her and told her he ran off. She’s going to figure it out, but that’s not what worries me. It’s the fact that she’s going back to a place, and to people, that are dangerous. I don’t understand why she wants to be with him so badly.”
“He’s all she knew,” I say, understanding.
Bryant liked Cova. A lot. In fact, I think he actually grew fond of her. Sure, he was still keeping her as a slave, but he also treated her better than me. I think, in her own twisted way, she thought he was special and that she was important. She thinks he loves her. Hell, she thinks she loves him. Her life was hard, and because of that, she grew fond of the person who took her from that, even if what he gave her wasn’t healthy, or safe.
“Still,” Briella paces the room, her hands tangled in her hair, her eyes stressed. “He purchased her and kept her as a slave. I don’t understand.”
“You wouldn’t, because it’s difficult to understand, but I understand. I saw the things only she knows, and I can see why she thinks that’s the best place for her. She’s miserable here, she has nobody to lean on or rely on. I’m not saying you’re not trying, gosh, you have all been wonderful to us, but what I’m saying is in her mind, you’re the captors who took her from a life she was content on living.”
“God, you make so much sense when you talk.” Waverly smiles at me. “You’re so clever, Merleigh.”
“Any idea where we might find her?” Mykel asks me.
I shift, my leg giving me a little pain. “I know a few places, but I imagine she’ll start with the house. I do know a few people around that area he had a lot to do with; she may go to them.”
“Then I guess we had better go looking for her tomorrow.” Alarick exhales. “Nothin’ we can do tonight. Merleigh, you okay to come and give us a hand? You know it all better than anyone.”
I don’t.
I really don’t.
But for Cova, I will.
I understand why they need me, I am the only one who understands, who knows, but going back there ... facing that again ... I’m not sure if I’m going to be okay with that.
I have my own life now, I’ve moved on, the club saved me and gave me a family I never thought I’d have, but that doesn’t mean the memories of my former life don’t sit in the back of my mind, haunting me.
“I will help,” I say, my voice a little shaky.
“Are you sure, honey?” Waverly asks, narrowing her eyes.
“No pressure. If you can’t help us, we completely understand,” Alarick says carefully.
“No, it’s okay. I’m happy to help.”
I’m not, though.
God.
I’m utterly terrified.
“WHAT WAS IT LIKE THERE?”
Everyone has gone to bed for the night and Bohdi and I are sitting on the front swing, his big body next to mine, his body heat making me feel safe, warm, and at ease. I love being this close to him, even though I know I shouldn’t let those feelings in. I can’t help the way I feel when I’m around him, it’s automatic.
Unstoppable.
“Where?” I ask, staring out into the dark night.
“With that prick who took you.”
Oh.
That.
I shrug, lightly. “He was cruel, unforgiving, and mean. But, he did keep us fed and secured. Coming from the life I came from, it wasn’t that bad. I guess, at the very least, I had a warm bed to sleep in every night and food in my stomach.”
“Why didn’t you run?”
“Where would I have run to?” I say with a broken smile. “I had nobody, Bohdi. No family. No friends. Nothing. Dax got me off the streets and sold me to a place that wasn’t any worse than the one I had come from. If anything, it was better. If I did what Bryant wanted, he left me alone. He fed us drugs, kept us content ...”
“He’s a fuckin’ monster.”
“Yeah, he is. But sometimes it’s better the monster you know ...”