Blush - Jamie Brenner Page 0,73
she could stare endlessly at the fullness of his lower lip. Or the dimple in his right cheek when he gave her a hard-won smile.
She couldn’t take it another minute. She leaned forward and kissed him. After a split second of hesitation, he cupped her face with his hands, kissing her back hard. She tasted the salt from his sweat and, pressing herself against him, felt his heart beating against hers. But then he broke away.
“Sadie.”
“What?” she said, breathless.
He smiled and shook his head. She stared at his mouth, those lips, incredulous that she had just tasted them. Her wanting was obscene.
“That was very forward.”
She felt a flash of irritation. She thought of the part in Lace where Maxine calls out the sexual double standard: a guy could get carried away by his passion, but a woman was always supposed to control herself.
“What does that mean? Why do I need permission to express my wants? Men never do!”
He took her hand and tugged her down gently to sit on the ground. The grass tickled the backs of her thighs. The sun beat down stronger again, but she felt impervious.
“My mother took the photo of the flowers and wine in the jar. She’s the one who taught my father how to do it. She has a feminist heart, too.” With that, he gave her hand just the smallest squeeze.
Well, that was her answer: No, she didn’t need permission to express her wants. Or maybe he was saying that he wanted her, too.
They locked eyes, and Sadie knew there was no way she was leaving with her parents this weekend.
Thirty-four
Leah and Sadie waited for Steven in front of the house. As soon as Leah spotted him pulling into the driveway she felt a ripple of happiness. She’d missed him.
“Hey,” he said, smiling as he got out of the car. “How are my girls?”
He reached for Leah. She inhaled his scent, pressing her face against his stubble. How could she have willingly spent so much time apart? It suddenly seemed like a sort of madness.
“Sadie, look at you! You’ve actually gotten a little sun,” he said.
“Ugh, don’t remind me.” Sadie put her hand up to shade her face.
“It looks healthy,” he said.
“She doesn’t like healthy. She likes the ‘I don’t need air or light, only books’ pallor,” Leah teased.
“Okay, on that note”—Sadie leaned forward and kissed Steven on the cheek—“I’ll see you two at dinner. I’m going to get some writing done.”
They watched her leave, bonded in the emotional shorthand of loving their daughter.
“I’m so glad you came,” she said.
“Me too. So you and Sadie had some quality time together?”
“Yes,” Leah said, and she could feel herself beaming. “It’s been wonderful.”
“I’m happy about that,” he said. “I really am. And now maybe you and I can have some quality time together.”
They looked into each other’s eyes, the tension of the past few weeks evaporating. She felt herself exhale.
“Can I show you the Chardonnay berries?” she said. “I love this time of year. All the fruit has come out. No matter how many times I experience bloom, it still amazes me.”
He smiled. “Sure. Let’s go see those berries.”
They walked hand in hand around the perimeter of the winery to the crop of Chardonnay. Crows called out in the distance. The sound of laughter drifted from the veranda. The day before, they’d had six hundred reservations for the tasting room. Leah examined the end-of-day receipts and noted that while every guest bought wine by the glass, only a fraction left with cases. She thought again about the book club. And her other idea—the one she would present at dinner, with a little help from Village Cheese.
Leah wanted to share all of this with Steven, but he would just hear it as lobbying to stay longer. That wasn’t what she was doing; she’d committed to leaving that weekend, and she would go. These suggestions were just her final effort to make a difference.
She bent down in front of the first row and indicated the baby green grapes sprouting from a shoot.
“That’s a lot of growth since I left,” Steven said.
“It’s amazing,” she said. The sun was strong, but a breeze rustled though the vineyard. If conditions stayed like this through August, they would have an exceptional vintage. If that even mattered anymore. She shook the thoughts away. This moment, at least, she should enjoy without worrying about the winery.
“You know what that tells me?” he said.
“What?”
“We’ve been apart too long.”
Well, she walked right into that one.
Steven