Blame It on the Bikini - By Natalie Anderson Page 0,60

independence. I respect that. If you want the big corporate law job, then fantastic. I’ll suck up my stupid fears and be right there behind you. If you decide you’d rather make your creations and try selling them, I can afford to support you. You can ask me for anything,’ he said.

She shook her head. She didn’t want any thing. ‘I can’t be dependent on you. I just can’t.’ She couldn’t give herself so completely to a guy who didn’t feel the same for her as she did for him.

‘You want me to give it all away?’ he suddenly exploded. ‘Okay, I’ll give all my money away. I’ll give a guy the shirt on my back and stand here naked and with nothing. I just want to support you,’ he roared at her. ‘And you won’t take it from me!’

‘It’s not your money I want!’ she shouted back. ‘It’s everything else. You have everything to give me. Love and emotional support, rather than financial. Strength. Humour. Play. Everything that’s so wonderful about you. I love you and all I want is for you to love me back.’

He stared at her. Stunned. ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ He gestured wide. ‘You never showed me. You never wanted anyone to know about us. You were embarrassed to want me.’

‘I was never embarrassed about wanting you. What was I supposed to do? You’re the ultimate playboy. Never with any woman more than a week. I had to protect myself somehow. I had to think of it as just a fantasy. If no one else knew then it wasn’t really real.’

He gazed at her, now motionless. ‘What do you think I feel for you?’

‘Lust.’

‘Absolutely. Lust is right up there. Right now so is annoyance.’ He walked towards her. ‘Also admiration. Frustration. But above all, love.’

She bent her head.

He put his fingers under her chin and lifted her face back up to his. ‘Mya, why do you think I want to give you everything I have?’ He gazed into her eyes. ‘I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone. Even myself,’ he joked just that little bit.

‘Brad,’ she choked out.

‘Has it not occurred to you that I’m the best person to help you with your studies?’

She laughed, but it was in despair. ‘I failed so badly at concentrating that night you found those cases for me. I had the wickedest thoughts going on that night. I can’t concentrate with you around.’

‘We weren’t sleeping together then. We were both frustrated. Wouldn’t it be different knowing you can have your way with me when your study goal is met? Won’t it be different now you know I love you and that you love me? And that we can be together as much as we want?’

Yeah, she still couldn’t quite believe that.

He muttered something unintelligible and then just swept her close, his lips crashing onto hers as if there were no other way to convince her. And she ached to be convinced, desperate to feel the security that should only be a breath away. She burrowed closer, opening for him, wanting to give him everything and get it all in return.

‘Do I really have to give away my money?’ he asked gently. ‘If I was a starving student, you’d share everything with me, right?’

‘Of course. But you’re not a starving student. It feels so unbalanced.’ She sighed.

‘Only in that one aspect and that’s only temporary. In another couple of years you’ll be qualified and raking it in, and I’ll take early retirement and you can keep me in the manner to which I am accustomed.’

She couldn’t help it, laughter bubbled out of her. ‘And in what manner is that?’

‘Restaurant meals every night,’ he said promptly.

‘I can do salads from the café down the street.’

‘Sex every night of the week.’ He waggled his brows.

‘And every morning.’

‘That too.’ He kissed her again. ‘You were right, by the way. I do my job because it makes me feel better about myself as a person. I tell myself I’m okay because I help kids. I make a difference, right? So I can’t be all bad.’ He sighed. ‘But I’m not all that great. I chose not to get too close to anyone and never let anyone see behind the façade. That was because, like you, I don’t like failure. Growing up in that house with my parents, I saw the falseness of their relationship. Swore I’d never have such a marriage. And that I’d never fail kids like that. That I’d