but try as he might, he couldn’t manage the words. Sweat formed on his temples and his chest contracted, that crushing feeling making it difficult to move or breathe. He looked at her, pleading with his eyes. Please, J.D.
Her head cocked to the side, brows drawing together, as if she was analyzing him. Then, it was like something clicked and she took a step toward him, her hand reaching out to cup the side of his face. Those hauntingly beautiful hazel eyes bore into him. “You really are afraid, aren’t you? Of what?”
Closing his eyes, he nuzzled at her palm, breathing in her comforting scent. “Of losing you. You see, despite the very short time we’ve known each other, I can’t quite imagine my life without you.”
She sucked in a breath, and her hands slapped over her mouth. Time ticked by and flowed, while they remained stuck in that moment, staring at each other.
Finally, she lowered her hands to her sides. “I gotta hand it to you, champ,” she said as her grin widened. “You have a way with words.”
His breath caught in his lungs. “So … you forgive me?”
She raised a blonde brow. “Not quite there yet. And you still owe me an explanation.”
“Right. I just don’t know where to begin. And there are so many details … we need to sit down and …” He ran his fingers through his hair. “And even then … you still might change your mind about me.”
“How about you just start with the basics, and you can fill in the details later? What was so important that you forgot about me? Just start with what’s really bothering you.”
“All right.” Just the important details then. “After I dropped you off, I got a call from my grandmother.”
“Your grandma calls you? How sweet.”
“Yeah. She’s … special.” He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Except for my younger half sister, she’s really the only family I have left. My grandmother lives in Europe and splits her time between London and Russia.”
“Russia?”
“Yes. My maternal family’s from there, and my father was English. It’s complicated, but my parents didn’t get along that much through most of their marriage.” That was probably putting it mildly. “My mum died when I was six. Car crash. Killed on impact.”
She sucked in a breath. “Cam, I’m sorry.”
“It’s all right, I don’t remember her much.” Only the stuff his father would scream at him whenever he was in his cups.
Whore cunt! She was with one of her lovers when they careened that sports car off that cliff. Damned bitch deserved it.
“Cam.”
Her voice jolted back to the present. “Anyway, when I was old enough, I was sent to boarding school. Didn’t see much of my father, but when I could leave for the summer, I would always spend it with my grandparents.”
“They took care of you,” she concluded. “And your grandmother was probably like your mother.”
“Yes.” Natalia was the only maternal figure he knew growing up. “But they weren’t that benevolent. The truth was, I was being groomed.”
“Groomed?”
“To take over the family interests back in Europe.” He struggled trying to figure out what to say and how much to say. Because if she found out the truth about that side of his family, she might look at him differently. “And well, the thing is, it’s always been understood that I would be taking over the … the business. Sure, my grandmother indulged me when I said I wanted to pursue my scientific studies and research first, but always with the caveat that when it was time, I would take over. I thought I had more time, but then my grandfather passed away unexpectedly. And well … time pretty much ran out a year ago, but I begged my grandmother to give me another year.”
“Wait … so you’re here temporarily?”
The distress in her voice made his polar bear growl. “I had to finish one more paper to complete my second PhD, and then this opportunity came up to do more research here in exchange for field work with the rangers.” He raked his hands through his hair. “I really was planning to go back. And then … I met you.
“I was so caught up with the whole mating thing and then she called me to remind me that my time here was ending. I don’t want to leave you, J.D., but I couldn’t disappoint her either. I panicked. I tried to find a solution, but every hypothetical scenario left everyone unhappy. So, I went