for asking, for the tester, or for the real-life nightmare Gavin had gone through later in having to kill his own brother.
“I never liked that part, scaring them. The chamber is terrifying enough, and the thought of failing is scary enough. They don’t have to make supplicants think they’re really going to die. It breaks people. It breaks children.”
Liv had never thought about it that way. The Thresher just was. Everyone went through it. It was inextricable from drafting, from the Chromeria. If nothing else, every drafter had the Thresher in common.
“The noble girls all knew what was coming,” Liv said. “Unlike the rest of us. They knew the test itself wouldn’t hurt them, so that bit of talking outside the test was the only thing that made them afraid. Because even if they’d been warned, hearing a tester who claims to belong to your enemy’s family say that accidents happen is terrifying.”
“Hadn’t thought of that,” Gavin said. “All my friends were nobles. I thought everyone knew what was coming.”
Of course you did. It’s just another way the Chromeria’s stacked to favor your kind.
Gavin cleared his throat. “Liv, my son might be special, really gifted. We’ll find out presently, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s a polychrome. He’s Tyrean, his mother just died, he’s going to face false friends and unearned enemies just for being my son; he won’t fit in anywhere and yet people are going to be watching him all the time. If he’s truly powerful on top of that… he could turn into a monster. He wouldn’t be the first in my family to handle great power poorly. The gift isn’t a pure gift, you know.”
“What do you want me to do?” Liv asked. Was she really going to be tutoring the Prism’s son? Bastard son, but still. She felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of her. The Prism was just the Prism—well, maybe there was no such thing as being just the most powerful man in the world—but he was a lord to whom she owed service. Normal service. Something not terribly hard, given how completely he’d changed her life.
“Maybe he’ll be a monochrome. Probably will be. I’m getting ahead of myself,” Gavin said.
“But if he’s not?” You’ve got to let me know what your expectations are or I’m going to fail—and then you’ll be mad at me for that. Typical nobleman. Liv felt good that she was able to be irritated. She was regaining her bearings.
“Pretend he’s normal. In all ways. I know he’d figure it out pretty quickly if we stay, but I’m going to take him away from here as soon as I possibly can. Until then, give him some normalcy. If he makes you mad, yell at him. Smack his knuckles with a stick if he misbehaves, you understand? But if he masters something difficult, pretend it’s good but nothing out of the norm. I want him to know that those who matter aren’t going to be impressed by who his father is or how much he can draft.”
“And who are these people?” Liv asked sarcastically. She hadn’t really meant to say it out loud, but Gavin was being ridiculously idealistic. Of course who he was and how much he could draft mattered. Maybe when you were born on the top of the mountain you could pretend the mountain didn’t matter, but those who climbed it and those born at its base who could never climb at all knew differently.
“Me and Orholam,” Gavin said, ignoring her tone. “If we’re the only ones whose approval he cares about, he’s got a chance.”
Liv didn’t know if that was the most arrogant or the most profound thing she’d ever heard. Maybe both. Whatever else it did, though, it reminded her who and what Gavin was. By Orholam’s scowling brow, she’d been glibly sarcastic to the Prism, the man closest in all the world to Orholam himself. And thank Orholam that Liv had turned down that awful woman. Even if it was going to cost her dearly. Spying on the Prism himself? It was practically sacrilegious. As bad as Liv’s stupidity and awkwardness and horrifying sliver of infatuation was, how awful would it have been to be a traitor too? She swallowed. “I’m sorry, Lord Prism, I was out of—”
Gavin raised a hand and stood abruptly.
Liv glanced at the crystal but saw nothing. The crystal hadn’t changed. She looked over at Gavin in time to see the Prism blanch—then his face was