them. It was going to he okay. It was going to he okay! Finally something was going to be okay!
I held out my hand to take her, but Matalina's soft "no" iced through me. No? What did she mean, no?
"Rachel, do this for me," Matalina said as Jenks tried to hush her, but a sharp gleam came into her eyes and she put a small, beautiful, and deathly white hand to his mouth. Jenks kissed it, going silent as tears fell on it and he wiped his dust from her. "This is my decision," the woman said, her fervent gaze fixed to mine. "I only ask that you keep Jenks alive through it."
My tears started, and I swallowed hard, grief rising from hope, seeming all the harder for the brief respite. No? Why?
"Mattie," Jenks protested, and her bird-bright eyes fixed on his. She was seeing around corners. Damn it. Not again!
"I don't want to start over, Jenks. I'm tired. But I'm proud of you, my visionary." Her hand shook as she touched his cheek, leaving a smear of blood. "For you to see the endings of what you've started is right, but I don't want to live beyond my children. I'm a mother first. You're a force, Jenks, and I thank my luck for having bound myself to you."
"You can be a force, too, Mattie," he began, his voice breaking when she shushed him. There was an ugly stain of red seeping from under her, and I knew she had only moments. Still, she smiled, giving him her love to the end.
"No," she said firmly. "I want you to stay when I go. Break tradition again, my love, and burn me alone in the home we built. I don't want you with me. You aren't done. You see too far ahead. You need to make the world in your thoughts a real one that our children can fly in."
"Take the charm, Mattie," Jenks said roughly, "and we'll see the future together."
"I'd rather hear it from you," she whispered, and my throat tightened as the tears slipped down. "I want to watch your eyes light up when you tell me. I'll wait for you under the bluebells. I'll be there always."
"Mattie?" Jenks cried, pulling her closer as he sensed her slipping away. "I don't want to be without you. I need you!"
Matalina's eyes opened wide, but I wasn't sure she was seeing him anymore. "Not as much as you... think," she said carefully. "Look what you've done. I'm going to die happy. All my children will survive. What mother can say that on her last breath? Thank you, Jenks. Sing to me? I'm so tired." Her eyes closed as she struggled to take a last breath, not to continue her life, but to breathe her last words. "I love you."
"Please, Mattie!" Jenks cried, desperate. "We can do this together. We can do anything together! Please..."
But she was gone, and he was alone though he held his wife, rocking her as he cried.
Chapter Twenty-two
I could do nothing, helpless as I looked down on them. Jenks... My tears hit the ground beside him, and I struggled to do something - anything - but I was useless. I was too damn big. "Jenks?" I whispered, my hands corralling him.
He blinked, the green of his eyes going deep into me. "She's not here...," he warbled, as if in shock.
I was too big. I couldn't hug him. I couldn't tell him it was okay by holding him until he found himself. "Ivy!" I shouted, then dropped to my elbows, trying to get closer. Matalina's face was streaked with blood and a silver dust, making her look like a weary angel. "Jenks, I'm sorry," I whispered, my throat too tight for more. God, I'm so sorry.
His eyes were wide, and the tears still spilled from him, turning to glittering sparkles as they dried. A smear of blood was on his cheek where Matalina had touched him last. "She went to guard the back door," he said as if dazed. "They must have been holding back," he said, and my chest clenched. "I should have sung her to sleep. She was so tired, and she wanted me to sing." Bewildered, he looked at me, his wings unmoving. "I'm alone," he said as if in wonder. "I promised to stay with her forever. And here I am. Alone. And she's gone."
"You're not alone. Jenks, please," I said, unable to stop the tears from slipping down. Somewhere I'd heard pixies