His breath hot at my neck, my vampiric instincts kicking into overdrive. Images flashed through my mind. A harvest moon. Gleaming fangs. The beating of wings. Footsteps in the dense undergrowth of an ancient forest. An animal’s call.
My instincts urged me forward, but this was still new territory, for me undiscovered. He’d bitten me before, but not like this. Would there be pain? Pleasure? Consequences? I was vampire, but still recently human, and I was afraid.
“Ethan?”
But he wouldn’t be swayed. He put a hand on my chest, across my heart. “This is for you,” he whispered, “as vampire, as woman, and for us, and for me.”
With two simultaneous thrusts, he bit—and thrust his body into mine.
I’m sure I screamed; I must have. The pain was immediate and intense, the sharp bite of needles piercing skin. But the pain was gone as quickly as it came, and then there was only pleasure. A euphoric spill unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. It burned like flame had been poured directly into my bloodstream, warming me from the inside out. Desire and heat raced through every artery and vein, forcing the sudden awareness of every molecule in my body.
But he was also there. I was simultaneously aware of every inch of him, and I wondered if he’d had the same experience when I’d bitten him, and how he didn’t spend every waking moment of every night with his fangs in someone.
I’d long ago made my oaths to Cadogan House, sworn my fealty and promised my allegiance. But this was vampire. Truly, honestly vampire. Dasein vampire, as he’d once said.
Ethan suckled at my neck, his fingers digging into my hips, his body plunging into mine over and over and over again. Suddenly he pulled back his fangs, his lips at my ear, and groaned out his pleasure. The sound was enough to push me over the edge. Fire contracted through my body, and I clawed at him as the sensation overtook me.
And then the world stilled again.
We lay there for a moment panting, my body suddenly heavy as the sun breached the horizon. And before consciousness left me, I smiled a little, thinking it was little wonder he’d wanted me to bite him twice before.
An hour later, the sun on the rise, he stroked a hand down my back.
“You’ve grown, while I was gone. Into your skin. Into your position. You’ll forgive me if I’m not used to it.”
“I couldn’t be clumsy forever,” I agreed. I had grown while he was gone, as much out of necessity as because of my own loyalties to the House. They needed me when he was gone, and I owed them my best. Besides, it was a lot more fun to be the capable vampire than the awkward one. I’d already had my stint as a weird, geeky teenager, thank you very much.
“I’m sorry I had to miss it. Granted, the reason I had to miss it was incredibly daring. Incredibly brave.”
“Daring? Really?”
“I saved your life, Sentinel. Even you said so.”
I rolled my eyes. “The statute of limitations is quickly expiring, Sullivan.”
“The larger point stands.” He touched my cheek, green eyes boring into me. “A moment of anger doesn’t affect the feelings that I have for you, nor does the unrequested involvement of an immature witch. They are constant. They are immovable. But that’s not to say that I don’t have fear. That I don’t worry I cannot protect that which is mine. My House. My vampires.”
I put a hand on his cheek, my heart bursting at the sentiment, but my own emotions in check by the sudden rush of memories…and fear.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“We’ve had so many stops and starts. For two months, you were gone. I soldiered on, Ethan. I battled Mallory back, and McKetrick, and Cabot, and I dreamt of you, and I cried, but I soldiered on.” I looked back at him and let show the fear in my heart. “You came back, and you rejected me again. What if you change your mind again?”
“You were right,” he said. “You were right and I was wrong. I reacted badly to her presence, and I pushed away the one person who understood, who fought beside me and challenged me to fight her. I don’t know what she can do to me. But one way or the other, we will find a way to fix it together. I will not leave you again, Merit. Not now, not ever. Granted, there will come a time in which