with a nightmare; could you be in and out in that time frame? No. That’s not fair to you or me.”
My mind is still reeling from his earlier words. “I don’t think I’d mind,” I say. “I’m not exactly suffering in that arrangement, you know. I did like sleeping with you.”
“Thank God for that,” he says, but his eyes dart back toward the staircase, and I understand. It’s not tonight, either. He needs to be with Haven—she might be asleep right now, but the painkillers will wear off soon enough.
I rise up on my tiptoes and press my lips against his. I make it sweet and soft, kissing him the way I’d want to if we were something, if this was a first kiss after a date.
He kisses me back gently.
“Three things,” I say finally. “Number one, I know you have limited time. Forty-five minutes of you is better than forty-five minutes without, so don’t hesitate, okay?”
I hold up a second finger. “I’ll head home now so you can be with your daughters. Does Maria have the morning off tomorrow, too?”
He nods.
“Then the second thing is this—I can come over tomorrow and make breakfast. We could make a thing out of it, pancakes and waffles and fruit. A kid who’s just fractured something deserves that.”
Ethan exhales. It’s a long, tired thing, but his eyes are filled with gratitude. “You’re too kind to me,” he says. “Don’t protest this time. It’s true. I’ll have to repay the Gardners somehow for having the good sense to leave for the summer, so I could get to know you instead.”
My smile feels brittle. “I’ll be back tomorrow. Text me when the girls are up?”
“I will. What about your thesis?”
“That’s the good thing about being a student,” I say. “My time is flexible.”
“What was the third thing?”
I force the words out. “If you ever want to fuck me over a kitchen island, mine is available.”
His eyes flash, and then he’s kissing me again, a good long while before he finally lets me go. “I’ll take you up on that,” he murmurs. “Sleep well, Bella.”
Guilt erupts inside me the second I close his gate behind me. With every kiss, every encounter, I feel myself slipping further and further into the lie. The time when it was just a tiny, inconsequential thing might have passed.
Because now, having held his daughter’s hand at the hospital, seeing the gratitude in his eyes… I’m not sure if it’s such an easy thing to shrug off anymore.
13
Ethan
“Daddy flip!” Evie announces. “Daddy can flip!”
Bella shoots me an amused glance under her sideswept bangs. It’s challenging. Go ahead and try.
She’d showed up bright and early, a mix for pancakes in one hand and a bottle of maple syrup in the other, just as casually stunning as always. Rosy cheeks and hazel eyes.
I give Evie a half-smile. “You want to see?”
“Yes!”
Beside her, Haven is watching me with wide eyes. I know what she’s thinking. She’ll ask to try in a second.
“All right, then.” I grab the large fry pan and twist my wrist, flipping the pancake high up in the air. After doing an Olympic-worthy somersault, it lands back in the pan.
Evie and Haven applaud. So does Bella, laughter in her eyes.
“Very impressive,” she tells me.
“Anything for the ladies,” I say.
“Can I try?” Haven says, stepping forward. I push back her honey-brown hair.
“I think you’d need both hands, sweetie. The pan is heavy.”
She looks down at her cast and gives a dramatic, pained sigh. I know for a fact she’s not in pain, though. I’ve followed the doctor’s dosage orders to the letter. Well, to the milligram.
“But you can set the table,” Bella offers instead. “I know you can do that one-handed.”
“Okay,” Haven says. “Can I use the fancy glasses?”
She’s asking Bella, who looks at me, her eyebrows raised.
“Yeah, go ahead,” I say. “She means wineglasses,” I tell Bella. “She likes to drink her water and orange juice out of them.”
Bella’s smile lights up her face. It’s the kind of smile that a man can’t do anything but stare at, wondering at his luck. A girl moves in next door who not only wants to sleep with me, but who somehow fit herself into this domestic narrative as well? It’s enough to make my mind spin away in what-ifs and could-bes.
“How fancy,” she teases. “Do you have them use linen napkins, too?”
“Yes,” I deadpan. “Evie’s starting finishing school next year.”
“Finishing school, huh?”
“Yes. Manners are really important in preschool. Who curtsies to who, you know.”