Big Sky Mountain - By Linda Lael Miller Page 0,115
being who I needed you to be. You were who you were. I don’t mind saying, though, that I want to be a different kind of man. If Kendra agrees, I mean to make her my wife. I’ll love her until the day I die, and maybe after that, too, and I’ll love that little girl of hers like she’s my own.”
Hutch began to feel a little foolish then, talking to a dead man, and anyway he’d said what he wanted to say.
One by one, he tossed aside the rocks that made up that pile and finally stood on level ground.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
HUTCH DIDN’T SEE Kendra again until the day of little Trace Carmody Barlow’s christening, when he showed up at the church in a pair of slacks, a white shirt and a lightweight sports jacket with a secret tucked into one pocket for later.
Most of the congregation had stayed on after the regular service for the special ceremony, and Hutch was mildly uncomfortable, stealing the occasional anxious glance at the ceiling, willing it to hold.
The new pastor, Dr. Beaumont, opened with a prayer.
Hutch bowed his head, like everybody else, but his eyes were partway open the whole time, drinking in the sight of Kendra standing next to him and wearing a green dress made of some soft fabric that looked supple to the touch.
When the prayer was over, Kendra opened her eyes, caught him looking at her and smiled slightly.
Dr. Beaumont took the baby boy gently from Joslyn’s arms, holding him securely and baptizing him with a sprinkle of water, in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Promises were made all around.
There was another prayer; Slade was holding the infant now, looking as though he might just bust open with love and pride. His resemblance to the old man was stronger than ever, except, Hutch noticed with a slight jolt, for the quiet self-assurance in his eyes. That was the difference—Slade was fine with being Slade, taking life as it came, but their father had seen it as a battle instead, something to survive and overcome, and the effort of doing all that had used up all he had to give.
The formal part of the christening ended and the small but enthusiastic crowd was dispersing. Now, there would be a celebration picnic on the grounds of the Pioneer Cemetery.
Hutch went over there ahead of time and wound up standing at the foot of his dad’s grave.
There was nothing to resolve, really; he’d made peace with John Carmody, once and for all, by taking down that monument up at the meadow, rock by rock.
Resentment by resentment, hurt by hurt.
All that was gone now, scattered, just like the stones.
Still, it seemed right to pause and silently pay his respects, because in spite of it all, he’d loved his father, known all along on some level that the old man had given what he had in him to give.
Folks started arriving right away, filling the picnic tables with food, kids running around, playing, adults talking and laughing in the shade of the trees.
Out of the corner of his eye, Hutch saw Slade heading in his direction. He’d taken off his suit jacket, Slade had, and the sleeves of his white shirt were rolled up.
He came to stand beside Hutch.
“You doing all right?” he asked, his voice husky.
“I’m just fine,” Hutch answered honestly. “How about you?”
“Never better,” Slade replied. “I’ve got everything a man could ask for and more.”
Hutch looked down at the fancy headstone, bearing their father’s name, along with the dates of his birth and death. It was hard to believe that a man’s whole life could fit between two sets of words and numbers like that, symbolically or not, but there it was.
John Carmody had been born, lived his life and died.
And behind a single dash, chiseled in stone, was the whole story, much of which they’d never know.
“He should have acknowledged you sooner, Slade,” Hutch said without looking at his brother. “Treated you better.”
Slade considered that for a few moments. “He gave me life. Maybe that was all he could manage. And he knew Callie would raise me right.”
Hutch merely sighed.
Slade rested a hand on his shoulder. “There’s a party going on over there under the trees,” he reminded Hutch. “How about joining in?”
Hutch lifted his head, grinned when he saw Madison running toward him in a polka-dot dress, her arms open wide.
He scooped her up when she reached him, carried her as he walked