Between the Lives - By Jessica Shirvington Page 0,53

okay for her. I was no good to her there anyway, locked up in a mental clinic. Eventually she’d find out. She’d hate me then. But I couldn’t just abandon her.

I opened my teary eyes, a new thought stirring.

Ethan could tell her.

He was the only one who knew about my worlds from my point of view. After I was gone, one day when she was older, he could visit her and tell her the truth so she’d understand that I wasn’t dead. Just the opposite.

But to do that … it brought me full circle. First, I still had to make Ethan believe me.

In a panic I fumbled for my lamp switch and a notebook, scribbling down Ethan’s questions while I could still remember them.

The thought of having to work at making Ethan really believe me was frightening. But making him understand was about Maddie now. I had to do it, despite how furious I was with him.

When I woke, my anger towards Ethan gave me a renewed determination to make my Wellesley world everything I wanted it to be. At breakfast I asked Mom if she could pick me up after school and take me to collect my Audi from the garage. I needed to be able to get around on my own. Mom already had a spa treatment booked, but was on the phone to Lucas before I could stop her. I actually heard his groan through the telephone. Mom, however, remained oblivious and was thrilled as she hung up, assuring me that Lucas would be there to collect me at the end of the day.

Miriam picked me up soon after.

‘Cute dress, it matches the circles under your eyes,’ she said, motioning to my plum A-line dress.

I shrugged, pulling down the visor to reapply some concealer. ‘Do I look that bad?’

‘Don’t panic. You look fine, pretty as ever and Dex can only see your fabulous hair at the moment anyway. What gives? Were you up all night partying? Will Dex look just as tired when I see him?’ She raised her eyebrows playfully.

‘No, I just didn’t get much sleep,’ I answered, hoping the conversation would end there.

‘Sure,’ she teased.

The problem was, Miriam was right – I did look exhausted. I was starting to fray at the edges in this world and I couldn’t let that happen. As I continued adjusting my make-up, I wondered how long I could keep this up.

But I had to. Falling apart was not an option. I needed to be the person people expected me to be here.

So when Miriam suggested we swing via the fruit shop to get more supplies for our diet, I suppressed the irks and smiled in agreement. It was worth it if Miriam went on believing that apples were the key to my recent weight loss. I even paid for our selection, carefully avoiding fruit shop guy’s eyes the entire time. With everything else that was going on, fruit shop guy was the least of my concerns.

Dex found me as soon as we pulled into the parking lot, taking my bag and wrapping an arm around me as we walked into school.

‘Nice dress,’ he commented, looking me up and down. I batted my eyelids. Mom had followed yesterday’s form and left a new outfit for me this morning. I had to agree with Dex, the perfect-shade-of-plum jersey dress was to die for and would assume prime position on my favourites rack.

‘I still can’t get over how amazing you look with that hair,’ he murmured in my ear, pulling me close.

I smiled, enjoying the attention. It might not always feel sparky and magical with Dex, but I knew one thing for sure – he adored me. He’d had his pick of all the girls at school and he’d chosen me, continuously, for the past two years. Not many guys do that. So what if he didn’t make me feel that … way I’d always imagined the L-word would? Tons of people said that stuff came with time. And time was something Dex would give me.

I snuggled into his shoulder and blinked away the gnawing memory of Ethan – how just the way he looked at me sent shivers through my body.

‘A bunch of the guys are going to Mixons tonight. You interested?’

I remembered Ethan’s list. But maintaining appearances in Wellesley was important too.

‘Sure. I have to pick up my car this afternoon and run a couple of errands first. Meet you there?’

He stopped outside my math class, pulling me to one