try to improve. Wasn’t it just on the way here that you admitted you have been behaving badly and implied you would try to do better?”
“Yes, but—”
“But what?” she sharply asked. “You can save your problem until we are in the carriage and heading home. For now, go and have one of those small biscuits or something, while you compose yourself. Before we leave, it would be best if you at least talked to Clarissa for a little while. However, I will not press you further. If you insist on leaving, then you may leave.”
And, with that, Sylvia walked away without letting Walter say a single word in reply. He felt her disappointment in him, somehow feeling it more keenly than usual. If only the revelation about Georgiana had not thrown his previous conversation with his mother out of his mind so completely…
Against his will, he felt hopeful that, perhaps, he could make things right with Georgiana. She was not married; surely there was still hope! And, while there was hope, how could he even consider pursuing anyone else?
What was tearing at his heart more than anything was guilt. Guilt and the very real concern she might never forgive him. Though she wasn’t married, there was a chance she might have another suitor by now…
Since there was no chance of speaking to her again that evening, Walter did as his mother had recommended. Miss Rutherford was easy to find and pleased to see him.
“I am afraid I must go soon,” he told her with a friendly smile plastered on his face. “But I wanted to talk with you for just a little longer before I left, and to apologize for being absentminded today.”
“Why, thank you for coming to talk with me. I was afraid you were not feeling well … I do hope you are able to resolve whatever is troubling you.”
You have no idea how much I wish the same! he thought to himself, instead replying aloud in all sincerity, “I assure you, I will do my best to sort the matter out before seeing you at the opera. I so much look forward to seeing you then.”
Just as he was about to leave her, her mother approached them. “Ah, I was hoping I could talk with you a little longer.”
He felt himself sigh on the inside, as he knew it meant staying even longer. “I was just telling your daughter how much I look forward to attending the opera with you,” he said, hoping he would be able to get away soon.
The hope was quickly dashed to pieces, however. The viscountess clearly felt it was an opportune time to ask him all about France, the fashions there, what plays were being performed, and many other such questions.
At one point, Walter was able to look around, his eyes almost instantly meeting Georgiana’s. He tried to hold her gaze, to communicate with his eyes what she had not allowed him to say with words, but she turned away with a glare.
Finally, he was able to get away. “I am afraid I know no more about those things. I am certain if my cousin Felicia were here, she would be able to answer your questions more fully,” he told the pair as he backed away from them.
“Well, I know you have to leave now, but I am glad I was able to see you,” Miss Rutherford replied.
With a slight bow, he took his leave, with the assurance he had more than done his duty. He walked to the carriage but did not leave. Since the garden party was nearing its end, he sat in silence with his own thoughts, while he waited for his mother.
One thought kept repeating in his mind; he had quite possibly lost his one chance with the woman of his dreams due to nothing but his own stupidity…
Chapter 15
Georgiana felt a wave of white-hot anger wash over her as she left Walter’s side to find her aunt. If anyone had asked her, she could have given them a long list of reasons why she was so angry with him at that moment.
Did he seriously just imply we could go back to the way things were before? The audacity of the man! After everything I have been through because of him! He didn’t even ask me if what he had heard was true! Can’t he see how much that has hurt me?
She was still fuming when she caught sight of Adelaide, who was engaged in a game of