Beneath the Stars (Falling Stars #4) - A.L. Jackson Page 0,134
your all for me, don’t you get that I would do the same for you?”
A remorseful sigh heaved from his lips, and it sent wisps of my hair fluttering through the night. His spirit burdened.
Yet, I could feel it catching up.
Coming to certainty.
To a place where it would fully meet with mine.
My fingers softly traced over his sternum. “That’s what you’ve always thought of yourself? As the one who was supposed to take care of everyone else? You thought it was your duty?”
A payment.
A penalty.
I still didn’t have the whole story, but the pieces were building into something devastating.
Shame shivered through the dense air.
“I have a tendency to hurt the ones I love most.”
His poor, beautiful, broken heart.
I didn’t need there to be light in the room to read the anguish inscribed on Rhys’ face. “I was nine when I caused an accident that made my father lose his arm.” The confession left him on coarse, cragged words that he uttered to the crown of my head.
Agony and grief.
He struggled, the man at war with his past, but he managed to continue, “He lost so much more that day, Maggie. I didn’t recognize it until I got a bit older, but I watched my family fall apart. He lost his job, of course, but as time went on, he lost his purpose. His will. He gave up, Maggie, and that was the worst thing I’ve ever had to bear.”
“And you blamed yourself.” It wasn’t even a question. I could feel the guilt radiating from his bones.
“How could I not when I know full well it was my fault?”
“You were just a little boy.”
“A little boy who destroyed his daddy’s life.”
Sorrow pulsed, and I burrowed deeper.
A promise that I would hold some of the weight.
Shoulder it.
Be there for him in every way.
Big or small.
In heartache and joy.
“I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine what you’ve carried your whole life, Rhys.”
Could feel the heavy bob of his throat when he swallowed. “Tried my best to be a man after that. To stand for my family. To take care of them both. Be strong enough. All I ever wanted, Maggie.”
His words were gruff, the fractures in this man’s heart finally breaking free.
“Stallion,” I whispered.
Rhys trembled. “Wanted to be.”
“You are. I know your father has to be looking down at you and see the man you’ve become. Your giving heart and your kind spirit. The sacrifice you’re willing to make. The love you give.”
Rhys choked back a sob. “Whole time, I’d thought he couldn’t take it any longer. Thought I’d finally driven him to his end. Turns out I did, but in a different way.”
My head shook with my cheek still pinned to his chest. “No, Rhys. You and your father were both standing for the people you loved. The ones you cared about. There is no blame in that. And I may never have gotten to meet him, but I promise you, your daddy loved you. There’s no way he couldn’t have.”
“Just wish I could have done more. Stopped it. Changed it. Still can’t believe…” He trailed off, stricken. “I can’t believe Noah was responsible. That he got to my daddy when he’d been comin’ for me. That it was him who hurt you. That he turned around and took Genny’s life. God…that poor girl.”
I refused the bolt of jealousy. Let the torment that had gushed from her fill me. Her fear. Her hurt. Her own ferocity. “It’s absolutely horrible. I’m so sorry, Rhys. I know you loved her.”
Rhys sighed. “I’m devastated for her, Maggie. That I couldn’t change it or save her. All those years, I tried. And I did love her, but not in the way you’re thinkin’. I would have done anythin’ for her. Anything. At the time, I didn’t know the difference. But I do now. I never burned for her. I was just in love with the idea of savin’ her.”
“When we were together…”
“Genny and I had been over for a long, long time.” He shifted me so his hands were framing my face, forcing me to meet the intensity in his gaze. “Goddess Girl, would never do that to you. Was just afraid I would fail you, too. Thought my life was nothing but bad marks.”
Nodding, I sniffled. “I don’t think you could fail me, Rhys.” I cleared my throat, pushing on, feeling like the time I’d been sedated had been a decade.
Like a new history had been written and I’d missed it.