She sprinted toward the restaurant, running to purge her demons, even though she already knew sweating and panting wasn't making anything better, that it wasn't going to bring Tony back to life.
After a cursory glance at traffic, she crossed the two-lane road, coming to a dead stop in front of the restaurant. Sharp pains knifed into her stomach as she bent over her knees, sweat dripping from her forehead to the ground.
Catching her breath, she stood up and tried to open the front door, but it wouldn't budge. The sign on the door said “Come back at 5 P.M.” No wonder the parking lot was virtually empty. She didn't need to look at her watch to know it was barely midafternoon.
But a lone car in the parking lot gave her hope that the place wasn't deserted. She pressed her face to the restaurant's frosted glass and caught a glimpse of movement.
Bingo.
She banged on the door. She'd pay double, triple, for her drinks.
She watched herself as if from a distance, knew she was acting crazy, but it didn't matter. She couldn't stop now. Not when she was so close to becoming blessedly numb.
A guy in a baseball cap opened the door. “Can I help you with something?”
“A drink,” she said, surprised by how raspy her voice sounded. “I need a drink.”
His tall, muscular frame took up most of the doorway as he assessed her. Maya was suddenly aware of the way her damp tank top stuck to her skin, the fact that she hadn't bothered to put a bra underneath it that morning. It had been all she could do just to get out of bed and brush her teeth. Hell, she couldn't remember the last time she'd eaten.
Since she'd hit puberty, men had told her she was beautiful. That she had great hair. Great skin. Great eyes. A knockout body. And there'd definitely been times when she hadn't been above using her assets to get what she wanted. But nothing was normal anymore, nothing was as it should be, and she didn't have it in her to work her wiles with a stranger.
“Are you going to let me in or not?”
The corner of his rugged mouth twisted up, whether in a grin or grimace she didn't know and didn't care.
He stepped aside and she pushed past him. “Whisky, straight.”
He wasn't much of a talker, thank God, not like some bartenders who would have already shot off five highly personal questions between the door and the bar stool. His hands were fast—sexy too, she was surprised to notice—as he made her drink.
He placed the glass on a napkin and before it hit the polished pine bar top, she grabbed it from his fingers, tilted her head back, and drank, shuddering as it burned going down her throat.
The first one would quench her thirst. The second might relax her tightly fisted stomach. All the rest would help her forget, if only for a few minutes.
Alcohol had never agreed with her and she knew she'd pay the price for this tomorrow. But all that mattered was making it through the next few minutes.
She put her empty on the bar and another appeared. “Thank you,” she whispered as she picked it up.
The bartender was staring at her, making her uncomfortable for all the wrong reasons. She closed her eyes as she swallowed. Ever since she'd picked up the phone three days earlier, Maya had felt dead inside. Sensation, taste, smell—it had all been wasted on her.
Until now.
Her limbs already felt loose from the whisky and she found that she could unclench her jaw for the first time in days.
“You live around here?”
She looked up at the bartender, into his dark eyes. Something about his smell was familiar to her, baking dirt in the sun, dry grass mixed with clean soap. Dark brown hair came just out from beneath his baseball cap and rough stubble covered the lower half of his face.
“No,” she finally replied, the word feeling strange as it crossed her tongue.
When was the last time she'd spoken to anyone? Yesterday? Or was it the day before?
Tony's fire chief had offered to take care of the funeral arrangements. All she had to do was pick up Tony's stuff from his cabin, and she couldn't even manage that.
“What brings you to Tahoe?”
“I've got to clean out my brother's apartment.”
“He's leaving town?”