Beauty In Her Madness (Winterland Tale #3) - Stacey Marie Brown Page 0,72

lined across my face.

“Fine.” I wagged my head, clearing my throat.

“Don’t lie to me. I can see something is wrong.” She pushed out of the chair, heading to me. “Tell me.”

Lei was probably one of the few people I could confide in. My personality was to keep it private, to bottle it up, and not let people see the cracks, but she was someone who understood that.

“Uuuuhhhh...” I let out a shaky breath. “Scott and I kind of broke up last night.”

“Holy. Shit!” she burst out, her eyes widening into saucers. “Are you kidding me?”

“No.” I peered down at my shoes. “I don’t know if it’s for good or just for us to figure out a few things.”

“Jesus…that’s a huge deal. I am so sorry. I know you two have been together forever.” She pulled me into a hug. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.” I stepped back, feeling sad, but also a little lighter for telling someone. “I don’t.”

“Yeah, I get it.” She pinned her lips together. “Are you sure you don’t want to come with me? Better than being all by yourself and dwelling on it. Have a little fun?”

“No.” I shook my head. “I’m gonna head home. Been a long day.”

“Yeah, sure,” she replied, grabbing her bag. “You have my number if you need to talk.”

“Thanks. Now, go on. I’ll lock up.” And then I would be going home to a cold, empty apartment, where the silence and emptiness would torment me.

I said no to everything outside my safety zone. It was a knee-jerk reaction. I was far too comfortable in my confined world. But I was starting to hate the walls I put around myself. Had I always been so controlled? Lei was as serious as I was about school, yet she still went out and had fun like a typical twenty-something.

Fear swirled in me, along with the thrill of pushing myself.

“You know what?” I didn’t let myself think. “I’ve changed my mind. I’ll go with you.”

“What?” Lei froze, her mouth dropping open. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” I forced my head to nod, feeling the doubt already seeping in, wanting the safety of my sofa and blanket. But I knew if I did, it wouldn’t be long until the space reminded me my life was in tatters. “I need to go home and change.”

“Oh, hell no.” Lei shook her head. “I know you. You’ll go home and never show up at the party. I have plenty of outfits in my car you can wear.”

“You have clothes in your car?”

“Of course. I’m barely home. I have several choices, depending on where I’m going and my mood. One should work for you.”

“I’ll go home really quick.”

“Nope,” she said firmer. “I finally got a yes out of you; I’m not letting it slip away. You need this, girl. If anyone does, it’s you.” She grabbed her car keys. “I’ll be right back. I promise I have something to make you look hot. A party after a breakup is a necessity. It’s part of the healing process.”

She ran out the door, allowing my fear to seep in. I really should go home, take my medication, drink some cocoa, put on a heartbreaking movie, and cry. Then call my mom and sister. Tell them everything that’s going on.

“Stop thinking, Dinah.” Lei was already back, her arms full of clothes. “You’re not getting out of this now.”

“I don’t think I have it in me to go. I don’t know how much fun I’ll be.”

“Has nothing to do with fun. You’re gonna hate it, I guarantee, but you’ll thank me for it later.”

I let out a laugh. “That is not helping your case.”

She tossed clothes at me, a strange smile curving her features. “Sometimes going a little crazy is the only way to find your way again.”

Chapter 20

Music thumped loudly through the house. Heat exploded across my skin as tons of bodies milled around the living room and kitchen of the two-story. Coeds holding red cups and cans of beer mingled under the glow of Christmas lights. It looked like a typical college bachelor house, with only a few pieces of furniture barely holding their shape. Everything was mismatched, banged up, and for reasons I’d rather not think about, sticky.

I spotted many people from my classes at the university. By their double takes, comments, and mouth drops, either they didn’t recognize me at first or didn’t believe I was actually at a party. I will give Lei credit; she did a good job