The Beauty of Darkness - Mary E. Pearson Page 0,84
had worked hard to forget it and prayed I had gotten all of her blood and none of his.
Lia paused, lifting Walther’s baldrick over her head and laid it down on her bedroll, then unbuckled her other belt that held two knives, dropping it with the rest of her gear. She stretched her arms overhead as if she was working a knot loose in her back, then surprised me by plopping down beside me. She gazed across the hills and woods that obscured the horizon and setting sun, as if she could see all the miles that still lay ahead of us.
“No knives to sharpen?” I asked.
Her cheek dimpled. “Not tonight,” she said, still gazing out at the hills. “I need to rest. We can’t keep this pace up, or the horses will give out before we do.”
I looked at her skeptically. Jeb and I had said almost those exact same words to her this morning, and she had only answered us both with a scathing look of contempt.
“What’s changed since this morning?”
She shrugged. “Pauline and I were terrified when we rode from Civica, but eventually we stopped looking over our shoulders and started looking for the blue bay of Terravin. That’s what I need to do now. Only look forward.”
“It’s that simple?”
She stared through the trees, her eyes clouded in thought. “Nothing is ever simple,” she finally said. “But I have no other choice. Lives depend on it.”
She shifted on the blanket and faced me fully. “Which is why we need to talk.”
She shot questions at me, one after another, a methodical urgency to them. Now I knew at least some of what occupied her thoughts as she rode. I confirmed her suspicion that the Komizar would begin marching after first thaw. As I doled out answers, I realized how little I actually had to give her. It made me see that, for all of my conspiring with the Komizar, he had kept me in the dark more than he had confided in me. I had never been a true partner in this plan of his, only one of many to help him accomplish it.
“There must be other traitors besides the Chancellor and Royal Scholar. Didn’t you deliver any other messages?”
“I only delivered the one message when I was thirteen. He mostly kept me out of Civica altogether. I tracked down deserters, or he sent me to deliver retribution to outlying garrisons.”
She chewed on her lip for a moment, then asked me something odd. She wanted to know if we would pass any place where messages could be sent.
“Turquoi Tra. There’s a relay post of messengers there. They’re fast but costly. Why?” I asked.
“I might want to write home.”
“I thought you said the Chancellor would intercept all messages.”
A fierce glint shone in her eyes. “Yes. He will.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
On the fourth day, we hadn’t gotten far when Kaden said, “We have company.”
“I saw,” I answered sharply.
“What do you want to do?” Tavish asked.
I kept my eyes straight ahead. “Nothing. Just keep going.”
“She’s waiting for an invitation,” Jeb said.
“She’s not going to get one!” I snapped. “I told her she couldn’t come. She’ll turn around.”
Orrin smacked his lips. “If she made it through three nights alone, I doubt she’ll give up that easily.”
I growled with all the fury of Griz, and snapped my reins, turning my horse around to gallop back toward Natiya. She stopped her horse when she saw me coming.
I came alongside her. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“Riding,” she said defiantly.
“This is no holiday, Natiya! Turn around! You can’t come with me!”
“I can go where I want.”
“And it just happens to be in the same direction I’m going?”
She shrugged. Her audacity appalled me. “Did you steal that horse?” I asked, trying to shame her.
“It’s mine.”
“And Reena said you could come?”
“She knew she couldn’t stop me.”
She was not the same girl I had met in the vagabond camp. I hated what I saw in her expression. Her cheerful innocence was gone and replaced with alarming hunger. She wanted more than I could give her. I needed her to go back.
“If you come along, you’re probably going to die,” I told her.
“I heard you’re going to do the same. Why didn’t that stop you?”
Her eyes were clever and sharp like Aster’s, and I looked away. I couldn’t do this. I wanted to strike her, shake her, and make her see how very much she was not welcome here.
Kaden rode over. “Hello, Natiya,” he said, and nodded like we were all