The Beauty of Darkness - Mary E. Pearson Page 0,72

delicious the roasted meats smelled and their eyes danced with visions of suckling pigs.

I was nibbling on the pine nuts I had taken earlier when I heard the rattle of halberds outside my tent and the curtain was swiped aside. It was Rafe, dressed in elegant full regalia, his black jacket draped with the gold braids of his station, his hair pulled back, and his cheekbones burnished with a day in the sun. His cobalt eyes flashed brightly beneath his dark brows, and waves of anger rolled off him. He stared at me like I had two heads.

“What do you think you’re doing?” he said between gritted teeth.

The warmth that had leapt beneath my breastbone when he entered quickly shriveled to a cold rock in my stomach. I glanced at the bowl next to me and shrugged. “Eating nuts? Is that against the rules for prisoners?”

His attention shifted to my scant attire, and his jaw grew impossibly more rigid. He turned, searching my room until his eyes landed on the midnight blue dress Vilah had hung on the dressing screen. He strode across the tent in three steps, snatched it down, and threw it at me. It landed in a heap in my lap.

His finger stabbed toward the tent door. “There are four hundred soldiers down there, all waiting to meet you! You are a guest of honor. Unless you want all of their opinions of you to match Captain Hague’s, I suggest you get dressed and make the small effort of an appearance!” He stomped toward the door, then spun with one last order. “And you will not utter the word prisoner one time if you choose to attend!”

And then he was gone.

I sat there, stunned. My first thought when he had walked in the door was that he looked like a god. I wasn’t thinking that anymore.

If you choose?

I grabbed my dagger and prayed for Adeline’s forgiveness as I altered the dress she had lent me, and Vilah’s forgiveness too as I pried free a long piece of chain from her chain-mail belt. I would attend the party just as he had asked, but I would attend as the person I was—not the one he wanted me to be.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

RAFE

I slumped against the paddock rail, where the torchlights from the party didn’t reach, and stared at the ground.

Quiet footsteps stopped near me. I didn’t look up, didn’t speak. It seemed every time I opened my mouth, I said stupid things. How was I going to lead an entire kingdom if I couldn’t even sway Lia without losing my temper?

“She’s coming?”

I shook my head, closing my eyes. “I don’t know. Probably not after—”

I didn’t finish. Sven could put it together without my rehashing every detail. I didn’t want to remember everything I’d said. It was getting me nowhere. I didn’t know what to do.

“She’s still set on going back?”

I nodded. Every time I thought about it, fear gripped me.

More footsteps. Tavish and Jeb came up on my other side and leaned on the rail beside me. Jeb offered me a mug of ale. I took it and set it on the post, not feeling thirsty.

“I wouldn’t let her go back either,” Tavish finally said. “We understand your position, if it helps.”

Jeb mumbled agreement.

It didn’t help. It didn’t matter how many agreed with me if Lia didn’t. As sure as I was that I couldn’t let her go, she was certain she had to leave. I thought about when I’d found her on the riverbank, half dead, and all the hours I carried her through the snow, all the times I pressed my lips to hers to make sure she was still breathing, all the steps and miles where I thought, If only I had answered her note, if only I had honored her simple request. But this time it wasn’t a simple request. This time it was different. She wanted to head straight into danger—and she expected to do it with Kaden.

I grabbed the mug of ale and swallowed it dry, slamming it back down on the post.

“You two are at cross purposes,” Sven said. He leaned back against the paddock rail studying me. “What was it about her that caught your attention in the first place?”

I shook my head. What difference did it make? “I don’t know.” I wiped my mouth with my sleeve.

“There must have been something.”

Something. I thought about when I had walked into the tavern. “Maybe it was the first time I saw her, and