of their faults though, so I can’t even get mad. It’s a fucked up world we live in.
Magnum opens his mouth, but then shuts it again. The move is so forceful his teeth clank against each other. Tension swirls between us, though I’m not sure why. “Finn said you had to go underground until they figured out how to get you off the hook for shooting that asshole?”
“I should’ve shot him in the fucking head. He got off too fucking easy.”
I lean forward, but the seatbelt locks into place and pulls me back. I scowl. “It wasn’t your fault they came for me.”
“It’s my—” He shakes his head, lips pressing together like he refuses to say whatever words were about to come out of his mouth. “I was supposed to keep you safe and instead, you were in a car accident, almost got dragged off by Gregory’s henchmen, and were accused of fucking murder.” A guttural sound passes his lips. “Kyla, fuck.”
His voice does something to me. He locks his hazel-green eyes onto mine, staring deep inside like he can see right through the armor I’ve already had to pull back on. He moves forward, hitting the button to release my seatbelt before moving next to me. Magnum hikes my leg over his lap until we’re sitting facing one another. My heart pounds in my chest like a crazy thunderstorm that has less to do with the fact he took my seatbelt off and more to do with him touching me. “I’m so fucking sorry I didn’t keep you safe that night.” I open my mouth to interrupt, but he barges ahead like a reckless soldier. “Don’t you fucking say it wasn’t my fault. You’re not my job, Kyla.” He licks his lips, fingers tightening on my legs. I don’t think he realizes how tight he’s holding me, and fuck me, I’m not going to tell him to stop. “From the moment you came here, you haven’t been a job to me.”
My throat dries up like I’ve spent all this time away in the scorched desert, and I crave Magnum’s next words like a tall, cool glass of ice water.
“I wasn’t going to say anything,” he concedes, warring emotions fighting it out across his features. “I was going to sit back and do my job. I told myself the reason why I was so invested in you was because of the job, but I’ve been lying to myself for a while. The moment that fucker wrapped his hands around you and tried to drag you to his car, I admitted to myself what was really going on. Fuck me. Add me to the list of guys Johnny’s going to end up killing because I can’t fucking stop.”
He’s captured my gaze in a way I can’t look away from. The green in his normal hazel eyes is deeper, darker, swirling with the truth he’s just admitted.
“I think there’s something here but tell me there isn’t and I’ll never speak of this again.”
I open my mouth but slam it closed again. My jaw hurts from keeping it shut tight. Words beg to be said, but I hold them back. I started to realize the increasing tension between Magnum and me before that night. I tried to ignore it because I already care for three men at the same time, and I’m not sure this is one of those scenarios where “What’s one more?” works.
The truth is, I can’t lie to another guy I like. I can’t sit here and tell him I care for him and then hold back the reason why I’m here. I can’t do that to Magnum like I did with the others, and there’s no way in hell I can tell Magnum the truth. He works for the Crew. He’s literally trained to take out threats, and I’m going to be K’s biggest one.
Magnum loosens his hold on me. “I guess I misread...everything.”
I watch as he slowly pulls his hands away from me. My heart breaks inside. Motherfucking shit! “Don’t.”
I bite my lip at the word that just forced itself out. Fuck me sideways. I literally have no restraint at all. It’s not my fault. A life filled with love is in my grasp, and I just can’t fucking let it walk away. Sure, some people might not understand me, but if they lived life in my shoes, they’d get it. They’d understand the longing for something that was ripped away. I want it back, but I want