Baewatch - Xavier Neal Page 0,32
drops down between us, and I’m tempted to change topics again.
Okay, I wasn’t picturing he’d say “yes, a thousand times”, but long, uncomfortable stillness damn sure didn’t cross my mind as a prospect.
“No,” Ax quietly professes, “I’m not typically with one long enough for that to be a possibility.”
“Then what your brother and his wife said last night was true?”
“It had truth to it; however, to declare it bluntly as such is to not tell the whole story.”
“Then what is the whole story, Ax?”
His eyes drop down to mine.
“Can you do a relationship? Should I be preparing myself to be dumped in a couple weeks or months when the sex starts to fizzle? Does the word monogamy mean it’s time to search for an exit strategy?” I come to an abrupt stop at the same time I declare, “I’m not trying to bully you into something you don’t want to be in, but I’m not looking to get my heart involved if it has no business being here in the first place.” Another surge of honesty splashes us both. “I don’t wanna waste energy entertaining notions that are being discussed simply to create a false fantasy you feel is necessary in order to get me into bed. I’m not that type of woman. It’s better you know that now and save you the breath you’re wasting if you have no desire to do this for the long swim. We can just keep the conversations in the shallow waters. Stick to talking about food and music and feet.”
“You do have sexy feet,” Ax mutters as he less than cleverly steals a glimpse of them.
“You are hand on the seashell the first guy I’ve ever met who’s actually been into feet.”
His gaze gathers mirth in it alongside his smile. “And you are hand on the board the first woman I’ve ever met I keep thinking about a real future with.”
The instinct to swoon is poorly hidden behind my closed lips.
“Brooklyn, I could stand here and tell you until I’m deep sea blue in the face that things are different when it comes to you, or I could do what I’ve been doing up until this moment and show you. I could tell you all about my past preferences, how eighty percent of the time the women I’ve been with were as equally uninvested as I was. I could tell you that age doesn’t factor into the situation so much as vibe with the unspoken rule you have to be legally able to consent. I could tell you that attachment to anything other than my boards, my dog, my business, and my bros is practically non-existent. I could tell you these things, create ripples of apprehension and doubt and unneeded skepticism, or I could take you by the hand…,” Ax’s fingertips fold with mine, “and insist that you tell your grandparents I had a hand in picking out those gifts so they pre like me.”
A multitude of mixed emotions submerges me, yet it’s the hopeful ones I let float. The smile that had scampered away returns, encouraging not only the ringing in my ear to stop, but my shoulders to slump into a more relaxed state.
“Will I be the first man that you’re dating to meet them?”
“Far from it.”
My swift and immediate response has his head tilting in question.
“Wow, yeah, that…that came out way sluttier than it should’ve.”
Ax provides me with a loud open mouth chuckle of comfort.
“What I meant, in spite of how awful my poor phrasing came out, is that my immediate family is…a very big part of my life. I talk to someone from it every day. I see my sister almost daily.” I skip the urge to tack on more information about that situation at this time. “Have lunch or dinner with my parents and my grandparents at least once a week every week. Sometimes we have girl’s days where my mom, my grandmother, and me go get pedis, manis, and do a little shopping, although my grandmother insists just because she’s old doesn’t mean she has to dress like it, which leads to some squabbling between her and her daughter.”
“Hey, Grandmother knows what she likes. I respect it.”
We share a snicker prior to me continuing, “Other times, me, my dad, and my grandfather will go camping and crawfish catching for a couple days.”
“Never been crawfishing. Camping, yes. Obviously, I prefer it on the beach-”
“Understandable.”
“But I’m open to other places…”
I allow my grin to grow wide and toothy. “My