"Don't say it, please," said my mother. She put her hands to her ears. "Please don't say those words."
"Don't you see, we must take him and go to Nazareth. We have no choice. Besides..."
"What star? What men from the East?" I asked. I couldn't hold back anymore. "What happened?"
Again, my uncle Cleopas laughed under his breath.
My mother looked up at me. She hadn't known I was there. "You mustn't worry about it," she said.
"But what happened in Bethlehem?" I asked.
Joseph was looking at me.
"Our house is in Nazareth," said my mother to me. Her voice was stronger. It was a voice for me. "You have more cousins than you can count in Nazareth. Old Sarah's waiting for us, and Old Justus. These are our kindred in common. We're returning to our house." She stood up and beckoned for me to come.
"Yes," said Joseph. "We'll leave as soon as we can. It will take us a few days, but we'll be in time for Passover in Jerusalem and then go on home."
My mother took me by the hand and started to lead me inside.
"But who were the men from the East, Mamma?" I asked. "Can't you tell me?"
My uncle would not stop his soft laughing.
Even in the dark, I could see the strange expression on Joseph's face.
"Some night, I'll tell you all of it," said my mother. Her tears were gone. She was strong for me as always, not the child she was with Joseph. "You mustn't ask me these things now. Not now. I'll tell when the time comes."
"This is true," said Joseph. "I don't want you to ask, do you understand?"
They were gentle, but these were clear and strange words. All the words they'd spoken were strange.
I should have let them go on talking. I would have learned more. And I knew it was a great secret, this that they talked about. How could it not be? And as for me hearing it, they knew they'd made a mistake.
I didn't want to sleep. I lay on my blanket trying to sleep, but sleep didn't come and I didn't want it. I never wanted it. But now my thoughts were racing. We were going home, and I had so much to think about because so much had happened, and now they were saying these strange things.
And what had happened today? What had happened with Eleazer and what had happened with him, that, and the memory of the sparrows insofar as I could remember it - these were like bright shapes in my mind for which I didn't have words. I'd never felt anything before like the power that had come out of me just before Eleazer fell dead in the dust, or the power that had come out of me just before he'd risen from the mat. Son of David, Son of David, Son of David...
Little by little everyone came in to sleep. The women were in their corner, and I had Little Justus snuggled up to me, Simon's youngest son. Little Salome was singing softly to Baby Esther who was, by some miracle, quiet.
Cleopas was coughing, talking to himself but saying nothing, then sleeping again.
I felt a hand on mine. I opened my eyes. It was James next to me, James, my elder brother.
"What you did," he whispered.
"Yes?"
"Killing Eleazer, bringing him back?"
"Yes?"
"Never, never do that again," he said.
"I know," I answered.
"Nazareth is a small place," he said.
"I know," I said.