Allegiance of Honor (Psy-Changeling #15) - Nalini Singh Page 0,169

of Father Xavier Perez

June 23, 2082

Nina,

I am in the mountains near—

• • •

XAVIER lifted his hand from the page and stared out over the mountains of his homeland. The sounds of children’s voices rose up from the village below, where the little ones learned under a woven canopy held up by six poles pushed into the earth. The weave was treated to be waterproof, and on the ground was a thick rug on which about half the children sat and recited their mathematical tables.

At the back were the older children. Instead of facing the teacher, they sat in small groups, their heads bent together as they worked on a project. This far into the mountains, there were no separate classrooms. The children all had large-size organizers developed especially for such usage, plus access to a remote teacher for different subjects.

However, as well as eating lunch together, they gathered together for an hour at the start of the day and an hour at the end to learn communally and to discuss their learning across age groups. It wasn’t only humans who sat under the canopy—several changeling children attended lessons in this village, since their pack had too few children to justify a separate classroom.

It gave Xavier’s heart solace to see their happy faces, their bright smiles, their innocent friendships.

But his own smile was long lost, for he’d finally reached his destination . . . only to discover that Nina wasn’t here. Judd and Kaleb hadn’t been wrong—a woman who could well be his Nina had been in this village less than a month earlier. She’d been standing in for the village medic who’d gone away for training, had moved on to her next post once the medic returned.

He swallowed, looked down at the letter he was writing, started again.

In my fantasies, I used to imagine that perhaps you’d lost your memories and that was why you hadn’t searched for me, but if this is you, then you remember your training, you remember being a nurse. You’ve chosen to stay here, far from me. You’ve chosen to change your name so I won’t find you.

My heart breaks at the thought of it but I won’t turn back now. I must know if it’s you and if there is any hope of begging your forgiveness. The villagers tell me you don’t have a lover that they know of—they are loyal to you, but an elder here recognized me as the man of God who had helped a friend in another village once. She was willing to trust me.

I must believe her. For the idea that you now belong to another—

Xavier’s hand shook.

Leaning his head back against the tree trunk, he blinked away the heat in his eyes, then put away the notebook and his pen. It took but a moment to pull on his backpack. Seconds later he was heading away from this village and toward where the elder had told him the woman named Ani had gone.

• • •

TWO days of trekking through the mountains and Xavier was a bare fifteen minutes from his new destination. Instead of carrying on, he forced himself to stop by a small waterfall. If this was to be his last meeting with Nina, he’d show her his best self. Stripping, he took out the biodegradable soap in his pack—thanks to a small care package that had been gifted to him by Judd’s mate—and washed himself.

Drying off afterward, he pulled on underwear and a pair of khaki-colored cargo pants before using his phone camera as a mirror while he scraped off the ink-black beard that had grown in during his journey.

Nina had always liked him clean-shaven, though she didn’t mind stubble.

Especially when they kissed.

Gripping the memory of her touch, her kiss, in a tight fist, he finished shaving, then splashed on aftershave from the same care pack. His hair, tightly curled as it was, needed no brushing. Reaching to the bottom of his pack, he pulled out a pristine white T-shirt, shrugged into it. The color was stark against the teak shade of his skin, the fabric a little stiff because it was so new. Beneath it lay a necklace he’d worn for years.

Socks and boots on, and he was as ready as he’d ever be.

His pack felt heavier this time, but perhaps that was his heart weighing him down. No matter. He had to go forward, had to know.

Stepping back onto the path, he made his way to the village.

Children saw him first; they always did.

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