All or nothing (Love in chaos #1) - Missy Johnson Page 0,43
to wake him, but I needn’t have worried, because he’s lying there, staring at me, like he has been for hours.
“Morning, sunshine,” he murmurs, brushing his fingers past my cheek as he hooks my hair behind my ear.
“How many girls have you used that line on?” I tease.
“Harsh,” he replies, but his lips lift upward into a sexy smirk. “I think you have the wrong idea about me.”
“Oh, really? We’ve been together for what, two days now. That’s your longest relationship, correct?” I’m teasing him, but I can’t help it.
“Oh, so you think you’re my girlfriend now?” he baits me, pulling me closer to him.
“No, I just meant you strike me as the kind of guy who doesn’t usually stick around the next morning,” I reply, enjoying our banter.
Nothing about our conversation feels awkward or forced. Just like being with him last night—twice—felt right. We feel natural together, like we work.
“This is my room,” he reminds me.
“You know what I mean,” I gasp, pushing him away as he tickles me. “You have a reputation.”
“A reputation?” he laughs. “Me?”
“Sure. Or you used to. Back in high school.”
“You should know better than most people that rumors aren’t always true.”
I know he’s only joking, but his words make me feel a pang of guilt. He probably thinks I was a victim as much as he was when it came to those rumors, when the reality is, I wasn’t.
There’s so much he doesn’t know, so much he deserves to know, especially if this goes any further. Anxiety bubbles inside me as I roll off him and sit up in the bed. I take a breath, determined to tell him everything before I lose my nerve, but he beats me to it.
“Can I ask you something?”
“What?” I hold my breath and wait for him to speak, because I can’t shake the feeling it’s going to be bad. Maybe he knows everything, and he’s been waiting for me to own up?
God, that would be bad.
“How did the rumors about us start?”
My heart rate slows a little, because it’s not quite the question I was expecting. It’s still not great though, because if I’m going to be honest, I have to tell him the truth. Will his opinion of me change once he knows I’m the reason they started?
“I’m not even sure where to start,” I say truthfully.
It’s such a complicated mess that there's really no easy way to tell him.
“Start wherever you want to.” He speaks softly and reaches for my hand, like he’s showing me his support. “It’s okay. You can tell me.”
“I was covering for someone.” The words come out a whisper.
I never thought I’d be telling Ben, of all people, this. I just hope to God that I’m not making a mistake by opening up to him.
“I thought what we had was something serious and I was trying to protect it. Someone from school saw us kissing and she thought it was you.” I pause, because this is the hardest conversation I’ve ever had to have. “I didn’t correct her.”
“Who was the guy?” There’s a sharpness to Ben’s voice that takes me by surprise.
“You’re angry at me,” I realize. Not that I can blame him.
He shakes his head and squeezes my hand for reassurance.
“What? No, I’m not angry. I just…” He stops for a moment, gathering his thoughts. “I guess I don’t like the idea of you being with someone else.”
I blink at him. “You’re jealous?”
He shrugs, almost embarrassed. “Is it that surprising?”
“I’m more amused than surprised,” I say with a grin. I have to admit, I kind of like this possessive side of Ben that I’m seeing. “This happened so long ago, when I wasn’t even a blip on your radar.”
“Hey, I didn’t say it was rational.” He wraps his arms around me and pulls me into his embrace. “So, you used me to cover up your relationship with someone else.”
I nod. “Back then, I never gave a second thought to how it might affect you. All I cared about was ensuring he never got into trouble…” My voice trails off, because I’m saying more than I intended to. “I feel terrible about it now.”
“Liv, who was this guy?” Ben asks. “Should I be worried someone was taking advantage of you?”
I don’t answer him, partly because I don’t want to lie, but also because I’m not sure how he’ll react. No. I know exactly how he’ll react. Badly.
“It’s all in the past. And if I were in real danger, don’t you think