The Alien's Equal (Drixonian Warrior #7) - Ella Maven Page 0,36
in the safety of Nero’s arms. And now I was here, I had to admit, it was everything I thought it would be. I didn’t want to leave this cocoon we were in. Right now, I could pretend we were just another couple sleeping in on a Sunday morning before we took the dog for a walk.
“Good morning, little bird.” His deep voice rumbled. “Did you sleep well?”
I hadn’t realized he’d woken up, and his nickname for me did a lot to turn my insides into goo. “I did.”
He let out a contented sigh. “Me too.” I unclasped my own hands where I had them tucked under my chin and slid my fingers through his hand.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m good.” I brought our hands to my mouth and kissed his knuckles. Slowly. One by one. They had been bruised yesterday but had healed during sleep in true Drixonian fashion.
His body went tight at my back, and his breathing changed. “Justine?”
“What did you think about when we were in that alley? When the Kulks were close by and you pushed me behind you?”
He didn’t hesitate. “Protecting you.”
“Did you think about regrets? Things you wish you did or didn’t do in your life?”
“I didn’t in that moment. My sole focus was on protecting you.”
“Oh.” For some reason that answer disappointed me, which was silly. Maybe I wanted to know that Nero had weaknesses like me. That he’d made mistakes. That he wasn’t perfect.
“That doesn’t mean I don’t have regrets, little bird,” he said softly, as if reading my thoughts.
I stared at the wall in front of me as his thumb rubbed the back of my hand. “Like what?”
He didn’t speak for a while, and I thought he wouldn’t answer until he began to talk in low rushed tones like the words had been waiting to be let out of their cage. “When my mother died, she told me I would be the future of the new Drixonian civilization on Corin. That they would need me and what I could do to rebuild. I promised her I would, that we’d be strong again. We’d repopulate our home planet.” He cut off abruptly and his chest heaved at my back. The pain in his words felt like daggers on the back of my neck.
I couldn’t imagine how much this hurt to say.
“I haven’t fulfilled that promise. Every rotation, I open my eyes and the first thing I remember is that I’ve let her down.”
I couldn’t take him spilling his guts anymore. Turning in his arms, I grasped his face between my palms, and the sight of the stark sorrow in his eyes nearly stopped my heart. “You were faced with an impossible situation at a young age. You didn’t let her, or anyone, down.”
“She was so proud. If she would have seen us being used by the Uldani, it would have killed her. Again.”
“Nero, you cannot put this blame on your shoulders. You’re working hard to rebuild. You have honor and loyalty. You can still fulfill that promise to her. We win this and we take back your ships and we return to Corin.” I smiled. “You have to show me those devas shrines, remember? You have to make me your mate.” I swallowed around the lump rising in my throat. The next words were ones I never thought I’d say. “And put a chit in my belly.”
He clasped me to him, bringing our foreheads together until all I felt was his warm breath on my face. His eyes shimmered. “I knew you were for me. Your words and presence soothe me. With you, I don’t have regrets. I could tell you I wished I had told you my intentions sooner, but I don’t think you would have reacted favorably. So, I can’t regret waiting. If I died in that alley, I died having tasted your lips, and that was more than I could have asked for.”
Jesus, this guy. “Nero,” my voice cracked, and I cleared it. “You are sweeter than I deserve.”
“I don’t think so.” He went silent until he asked. “Did you have regrets?”
A tear trickled out of the corner of my eye to soak the fur below my head. “Yes.”
His arm squeezed and he pressed a kiss to my temple. “Tell me.”
“I don’t have many,” I said. “Maybe only one.” He was very still, his one arm around my back while the other grabbed my hand between us. “It’s about you.” I was pretty sure he wasn’t breathing. Was he nervous at