Alibi (Brantley Walker Off the Books #5) - Nicole Edwards Page 0,26

in love with not only Travis but also with Gage. Curtis remembered those days, the way Travis and Gage had been battling it out, until they finally gave in to the love that had developed between the three of them.

And since then, they’d had five beautiful children, whom they cherished and loved. The very children who clung to their fathers now, sobbing because their mother had been taken from them far too soon.

Also here to celebrate her life and grieve her loss was every single member of Curtis and Lorrie’s family. Aunts, uncles, cousins. They’d all known Kylie, most having spent a significant amount of time with her over the years, at family gatherings, birthdays, celebrations. But family weren’t the only ones gracing the pews of the church on this cold, rainy Thursday. The place was at standing room only because of the love and support that Kylie had garnered over the years. People, most of whom Curtis had been introduced to, had come from far and wide to grieve the loss as well as show their support for Kylie’s family.

He was simply glad they were here, grateful that there were those who could help hold up the ones who were suffering the most from this incomprehensible loss. Curtis knew this was only the beginning. They had a long road of healing ahead of them and it wasn’t going to be easy, but together, they would learn to cope.

And each day … starting far in the future … it would get a little easier to breathe, to reflect. And the memories that surfaced would be a bit more vibrant without the suffocating haze of such pain.

Chapter Eight

Travis was numb.

If it wasn’t for that fact, he would probably be cold considering he’d been standing at Kylie’s gravesite for the past few hours. He had endured the final words, the sobs, the well wishes, and the departure of those who’d gathered. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to leave. He intended to be here until her casket was lowered into the earth and covered with dirt, unwilling to leave her side until he absolutely had to.

He couldn’t count the number of people who had tried to console him, urging him to go home, get some rest. And he knew exactly how many he’d spoken to. None. He had no words because there was nothing he could say that would make this okay in any way, nor easier to bear, so he’d kept his mouth closed and pretended to listen.

“Travis, they need to lower the casket now.”

He managed to drag his gaze over to see his father looking at him with such pain in his eyes. Beyond him, Pastor Bob stood by, his expression solemn. Travis could understand it. He knew everyone was feeling the loss, and while he had nothing to say, he wasn’t diminishing their grief in any way. He was simply trying to deal with his own.

“I need a few minutes,” Travis managed.

“Of course. We’ll wait until you’re finished.”

Travis didn’t care if they waited or if they left. It didn’t matter to him. Nothing mattered anymore.

Once he was alone again, Travis stepped forward, placed his hand on the glossy mahogany that entombed his beautiful wife. The casket had been hand selected by Jessie because she claimed Kylie would’ve loved it. She had mentioned how the royal-blue silk on the inside was Kylie’s favorite color. Travis had kept his opinions to himself because he didn’t understand the rationale. What Kylie would’ve loved was to be alive and well and watching her babies grow up, not lying cold and dead on a bed of royal-blue silk.

It was then the tears returned and Travis didn’t attempt to stop them.

“It should’ve been me, baby,” he whispered. “It shouldn’t be you leavin’ us so soon. It shouldn’t be you the kids have to live without. It should be me.”

He took a deep breath, tucked his hands in his pockets.

“I’m so fuckin’ sorry, Kylie. I should’ve stopped her. Instead, I went off the rails, became obsessed, and lost my focus. I gave her the perfect opportunity to strike at me again.” He sobbed. “This is my fault, baby. All my fault.”

Travis focused on breathing. His chest constricted so tight he thought he might drop to his knees from the pain of it, but he pushed through because the pain was the least he deserved.

“I will find her,” he promised. “I will. Might not be today, or tomorrow, but it will happen. And when I do, I will