sleepy Chase waltzed through the room. I took in the dark circles under his eyes and his wrinkled shirt. His light brown hair was a mess as he looked around. “What are you doing in here?” he asked.
“Finding some clothes to wear for school.”
We both stood awkwardly in Violet’s bedroom. “I haven’t been in here since…” Chase’s voice trailed off, and he started looking around. I followed his movements with my eyes.
On Violet’s nightstand was a photo of her and Chase as kids, chasing one another on the hot sand at the beach. I was in the background, sitting on a towel and reading a book. On the wall, there was a shelf full of sports trophies. Violet ran track, and I remembered going to her meets to cheer for her. When I breathed in, I could still smell her faint coconut shampoo.
“Get dressed,” Chase coughed out. “I’ll take you to school.”
“Are you not going?” I asked before walking over to him. Chase faced me and reached out to grab my wrist.
“No. I have stuff to do.”
“What kind of stuff?”
Chase interrupted my questions with a frantic kiss. He moved so fast that his lips missed mine and instead landed on the outer corner of my mouth. His grip on me hardened. He was holding me so tightly I knew it would bruise. “I’ve got shit to do. I’ll catch up with you later, though.”
“Chase, I’m worried about you,” I murmured, making him hold me even tighter. I jerked out of his grip, and he sighed.
The room was bright but felt ominous. I waited for him to speak, with only the quiet tick of Violet’s wall clock to break up the dark silence. “Don’t worry about me,” Chase urged.
“Someone’s got to,” I replied before wrapping my arms around him for a hug. He was rigid in my hold, but I didn’t care. I pressed my cheek to his chest and breathed him in. “I’m here, okay? I’m here for you.”
Chase placed his hands on my shoulders and gently pushed me away. “Get ready for school, Breezy.”
I watched him exit the bedroom and did as he said, worrying about what Chase was up to as I slipped on Violet’s clothes. He drove me to school in almost complete silence. It wasn’t the comfortable sort of silence we usually shared, but the kind you could cut with a knife.
When he pulled up to the student entrance, I stalled for a moment, fidgeting with my seatbelt. I wanted to say something comforting that would let him know that he’s not alone in this. But I just couldn’t find the right words to say, so I got out of the car.
“I have my first shift back at the surf shop tonight, but if you need anything, call me and I’ll be there,” I said to him, holding the car door open.
“I’m fine, Breezy. Don’t worry about me,” Chase said as he reached across the seat and pulled the door shut. I stood there staring as he tore out of the parking lot. Not knowing what else to do, I headed inside the building and went to class. I was way out of my depth and had no idea how to help him.
It was odd being in the surf shop again, but I welcomed the normalcy. For the last month, Dad had practically been living at the shop, taking care of things, while I worked through my emotions. Even though Violet wasn’t always at work, she did help a lot. He had to make up for two employees being gone, and I was ready to get back to the grind.
I loved my job. I loved geeking out about new boards and chatting with eager tourists enamored with island lifestyle. I grew up at this shop. Here, I felt like the bravest version of myself. I knew my shit. I didn’t feel tongue-tied or awkward. Surfing was my world, and even though my injury kept me from getting in the water and working my frustrations out on the waves, being here felt like taking a step back to safety. Warmth. Familiarity. And after last night, the mundane distraction was just what I needed.
Dad was reorganizing some of the souvenirs. I was glad to have some time with him, too. He looked exhausted, with black circles under his eyes and a solemn posture that made me feel bad for not coming in sooner. I’d caught him staring off in the distance multiple times.