I waited until I was turned around to grin. I doubted she’d like my amusement just now. Climbing into her small excuse for a vehicle, I glanced over at her. “You’re going to need a larger and safer vehicle for the baby.”
She sighed. “I know that. Why are you doing this?”
Change of subject. “I told you that seven days and five hours and twenty-two minutes ago. Don’t tell me you forgot already.”
Nan made another sigh of frustration. “Yes, you did. But you’ve been gone since then, so I assumed you’d changed your mind. And did you really just give me the exact amount of time it’s been since you said that?”
Changed my mind about loving her? Did she think so little of love? Her damage was deep. I had to be careful with that. “Yes, I did. Twenty-three minutes now.”
She was watching me as I pulled out of her drive and onto the street leading out of town and toward Destin, where I knew her doctors office was. I didn’t look at her. I let it soak in. The fact that I was here. The fact that she was about to realize I knew where we were going and I wasn’t asking her for directions. The fact that I loved her and I wasn’t going anywhere. Even when she ran from me.
“Are you mentally stable?” was her next question. This one made me laugh.
“Probably not,” I replied with complete honesty.
“I didn’t think so.”
Again, I laughed. Something I hadn’t done in a very long time. Nan brought a lot into my world. Including a reason to laugh. Something I’d had very little of in my life.
“I don’t know what to do with you. I thought I loved Gannon, but he doesn’t exist. It was a role you were playing. I don’t know you. We’re having a child together, and I may not like you at all. I may hate you.” Her honesty was part of her charm that people couldn’t handle.
“The man you knew is the me that no one has ever gotten but you. It was real. I didn’t pretend to be anyone other than myself. I gave you the man I’ve never given anyone. I trusted you with me. Like I knew we would, we clicked. Locked into place like two lost pieces waiting for their match.”
She didn’t respond to that. We drove on in silence for a while.
I let her think about it and work it out in her head. I didn’t need to force her to accept what I was telling her. I needed her to believe me and allow me to show her that this was the truth. Gannon had been more me than the man I’d been showing the world since I was ten years old.
The only bullying I would do with her was when she had doctor appointments and when she needed help. I would be there for those. She wasn’t alone anymore. In time, she’d realize that. I was patient. I had time.
“You know where my doctor is,” she said simply when I pulled into the parking lot.
“Yes. I make sure I know everything important. This is important.”
She didn’t move to get out when I parked. Instead, she sat with her hands in her lap. “I loved Gannon.”
“I know.”
She nodded but didn’t look at me. She kept her gaze focused straight ahead. “I need time to get to know Cope.”
“He’s the same man, but I understand. I’m here when you’re ready to give me a chance.”
“I’m ready.”
“Good.”
Nan
I had fallen asleep on the way back from hearing our baby’s heartbeat. It had been strong, and the doctor had been pleased. The relief must have been enough to relax me, because I’d taken a nap, completely unconcerned, with Cope at the wheel.
He had woken me when we arrived home, then tucked me into my bed. Sleep had come back once again, snuggling me up and pulling me in. Napping had never been so delicious. I did it often these days.
When I opened my eyes, I smelled something appealing drifting up the stairs from the kitchen. A glass of ginger ale was beside the bed, and I took a long drink before getting up. He’d known this was what I would want when I woke up. He knew everything. I wasn’t sure if that was creepy or endearing.
The way he had held my hand while we listened to the heartbeat fill the room had made my heart squeeze. I had expected to do that alone, but in that moment, I’d been so thankful that I had someone there who was as overwhelmed and awed as I was. I got to share it with him.
He’d said he was the same man as Gannon, but there were things about him that made me disagree. Cope was softer than Gannon. He showed love where Gannon had not. I realized Cope made me feel secure in a way that Gannon had not. I always felt as if Gannon would vanish at any moment, but the man I’d been introduced to as Cope I trusted to stay. Even as I fought the fact that I wanted him here, I knew he wouldn’t leave.
I didn’t want him to.