What I wanted out of life? Did I know? Was it even the same anymore? “I know a lot less than you think I do.”
She smirked. “Is that so?”
Kissing those sexy little lips was tempting. Oh so tempting. “When’s your birthday?” I asked instead of responding to her remark.
Della sighed and she looked away from me. “April sixth. When is yours?”
“December tenth. What’s your favorite color?”
She giggled. “Blue. Pale blue. What’s yours?”
“A month ago I would have said red but I’ve changed my mind. I like blue now too.”
“Why?” she cocked an eyebrow and gazed up at me.
I wasn’t about to tell her it was because her eyes were blue. She’d get all tense on me again. “A guy can change his mind. I’m allowed to like blue now.” I didn’t give her time to think about that. “Who was your first grade teacher?” I asked quickly to distract her. Della stopped dancing and she backed away from me. Her eyes appeared almost glassy. Had I said something wrong? Had she figured out why I had said blue was my favorite color?
“I need a drink,” she said with a wobbly nervous smile then darted off away from me.
How could I upset her by asking her about her first grade teacher? There was something deep in her eyes that told a story I feared I’d never know.
Della
It was a simple question. Sweet, really, that he’d even care. Had anyone ever cared about such trivial things concerning me before? I had never been asked such personal innocent questions. But he’d asked about my teacher and all I could see was my mother.
Sit here Della. Don’t look out the window. You have to do this work. To be smart you need to read Shakespeare. He will remind you how dangerous the world can be.
I shook my head to clear the memories. I couldn’t do this here. Not now.
It’s dark out there Della. Bad things are in the dark. Lock your windows and doors and stay tucked in tight. The monster under your bed will hear you if you get up.
No momma. Go away.
“Della, don’t go outside again tonight. The bad is out there waiting on you. Stay with me. Your brother worries about you. He doesn’t want you hurt. Be safe in your bed.”
“Della, are you okay?” Strong arms were pulling me close. I went willingly. I needed away from her. I didn’t want to remember that night. I knew I would if she stayed in my head too long.
“I’ve got her. Move.” Woods’ voice sent warmth through me. I was breaking free from the memories. They weren’t taking me this time.
Cool night airbrushed my face and I realized I was being carried. I took a deep calming breath and the tightness in my chest was gone. Woods had brought me out of it. I hadn’t been left to remember alone.
I blinked several times and my eyes came back into focus. The darkness was gone.
Woods sat down on a bench along the beach boardwalk and kept me firmly in his lap. “You’re back,” he said simply.
I nodded. I wasn’t sure what to say. I didn’t want to tell him what had just happened.
“Good,” he said simply and brushed my hair out of my face with his free hand. He still held me cradled against his chest with his other.
“Thank you.”
Woods’ mouth was in a tight line. He was concerned. I’d scared him. I started to sit up and he held me tighter. “You’re not getting up until you tell me something.”
My stomach knotted up. I’d never told anyone other than Braden and she knew why. I couldn’t tell Woods. I didn’t talk about it.
“You don’t have to tell me why that just happened. But does it happen often?”
This wasn’t a fair question. Telling him the truth without telling him about my past would only make him think I was crazy. Maybe I was. No one was sure yet. I could be… she was crazy. I could be too. It was my greatest fear, that I’d snap one day too. Just like she had. I wanted to live life because if that day came I wanted to have lived once.