“I’m clean. I swear. I get checked regularly and I always wear a condom.”
“You’re sure?” she asked, still standing very still.
“Very sure.”
“I didn’t realize, but it felt different. Better.”
God, yes, it had felt like f**king nirvana. I had never had sex without a condom. I had no idea this was what all the fuss was about. Holy hell, I wanted that again.
“Let me wash you,” I told her, stepping back.
She immediately looked down at her legs and then back up at me. A small smile touched her lips. “I feel kind of marked.”
I stopped reaching for the soap and stared at her. Had she really just said that? “If you like being marked then I’ll mark you any damn time you want me to,” I told her before taking the soap. “Turn around. I’ll start with your back,” I instructed.
Harlow
When I opened my eyes Grant’s arm was wrapped around me and I was nice and warm, tucked against his chest. I glanced at my closed door. The clock beside the bed said it was after eleven in the morning. Nan would be awake by now. Was I ready to face this?
“Stop thinking so hard,” Grant mumbled sleepily.
He wasn’t at all worried about Nan. I didn’t understand their relationship at all. If I was smart I wouldn’t be snuggled up in bed with someone who had any kind of relationship with Nan. But having the willpower to ignore Grant’s sexy smile and smooth-talking ways was almost impossible.
“I won’t let her do anything to hurt you,” Grant said into my hair.
That wasn’t what I was worried about. I could take on Nan if I had to. I was more concerned with making a choice that would eventually break my heart. Could I love Grant? Was I falling in love with him? Was it fair for me to love him?
Yes. I was positive I could love him. But I wasn’t in love with him right now. This was simply attraction, and possibly a crush. He flashed his smile and I did dumb things. That would be considered a crush, right? And if he wasn’t in love with me then would it hurt for me to love him? Even if he didn’t know my secret yet?
“Turn around and look at me,” Grant said, letting his tight hold on me go so I could actually move.
“Why?” I asked.
“Because I don’t like where your head is. I need to fix it,” he replied.
He had no idea where my head was. And he really needed to get over wanting to fix everything for me.
“I’m not worried about Nan,” I told him. Okay, maybe I was a little. I didn’t like confrontations, and the one I had waiting on me when we left this room was going to be dramatic.
“Then why are you so quiet?”
“I’m trying to figure out what we’re doing. If I’m headed for possible heartache in the future,” I replied honestly. There was no reason to lie to him. I wasn’t one for pretenses.
“Turn around,” Grant growled, pulling my arms around him this time.
This was a bad idea. His face looked even better all sleepy. His eyes weren’t fully awake, which only made his long lashes more obvious. And his hair was all messy. Made a girl want to run her hands through it.
“I don’t do relationships. Closest I got was with Nan, and that was because she was so damn needy. I liked being needed. No one ever needed me. She did. But then she was also crazy as f**k and heartless, and that ended things for me. So what you and I are doing right here is a first for me. I’ve never wanted to wake up and cuddle with a female in my life. I’ve never missed her when she wasn’t around. You’re all I can think about, Harlow. Where I’m headed is new to me, but I damn well want to go there as long as that’s where you’ll be. You’re worried about getting hurt, but I don’t think you understand yet that you’re holding all the damn cards, sweet girl. All the damn cards.”
I stared up at him and let his words sink in. Why me? What was it about me that made this man want to do something he had never done before? Was I needy? Did he think I needed him? Because I was pretty damn self-sufficient.
“I’m not needy,” I told him.
He grinned. “I already figured that out. But I am—at least where you’re concerned.”
And there went my resolve to strengthen one of the walls I had built around myself. Instead, it crumbled a little. This man knew exactly how to make me weak.
I started to say more when a loud banging noise sounded at the door, followed by “Grant Carter, get your f**king worthless ass out here NOW!”