I reached down and laced my fingers through hers and she let me. “I drove a rental car. You want to ride with me?”
She glanced over at the limo. “Yeah. I do. Dad wants to stay until tonight and I need to leave him the limo.”
Good. I wanted her beside me.
“You ready now?” I asked.
She glanced back at the house. “Yeah, I am. I can’t take any more today. And he needs his alone time with her. I think she needs him, too.”
I wasn’t sure what all went on in that room today, but I knew it had changed things for Harlow. Her life was forever different. The crying wasn’t over, either. I had a feeling more mourning would come. And I intended to be there. She wasn’t going to deal with this alone.
•
We were headed back to the desert and I had let Harlow pick the music. I also left her to her thoughts. She needed to think and process all she had seen today, and I understood that. I glanced over at her every once in a while to make sure she wasn’t crying.
“I’m not going to break down again,” she finally said.
“Do you want to talk about it?” I asked. Harlow wasn’t a big talker when it came to her feelings, but after today I felt like she really needed to talk. Keeping that bottled up wasn’t good for her.
“I was so angry at him. At everyone who had lied to me. But then . . . I saw him with her. No one could have prepared me for that.” She shook her head and looked down at her clasped hands. “It definitely changed a lot between us today. I’ve always known that Dad loved me more. I hated to say that out loud, but I knew it and I felt guilty about it. Now, I get it. I don’t think it’s me he loves more. I’m just the kid that she gave him. I’m his connection to her.”
I thought about Mase and how distant he seemed when he talked about Kiro. As if Kiro wasn’t his father at all. And then there was Nan. I knew Kiro wasn’t a fan of hers. Harlow, however, needed Kiro and she loved him. I didn’t argue with her, but it was more than just her mother that made Harlow the favorite child.
“This is his last tour. He hates leaving her. I couldn’t even argue with him. The world may want Kiro, but Kiro wants to be with her. Even like she is . . . he wants to be near her.” Harlow let out a soft laugh. “And to think I thought my dad’s heart had been buried with my mom.”
I glanced over at her. “Do you plan on going back to see her?” I asked.
Harlow nodded. “Yes. She can’t talk to me and I don’t even know if she realizes who I am, but I know about her now and that’s enough. I want to . . . I want to be the one to tell her about my life. And maybe she is truly smiling when people talk to her. If I spend more time with her, then maybe I will find a way to have some relationship with her.”
I could hear the hope in her voice. She wanted to know her mother. It made sense. I just wasn’t sure I could personally handle it if she left there broken every time. I reached over and tugged her hands free from each other and laced my fingers through hers. “I’m always here to go with you. Don’t think you have to go alone. I will gladly wait in the car until you’re ready to leave.”
A soft smile touched her lips, and she laid her head back on the seat and turned to look at me. “Thank you,” she said simply.
“Anything you ask, Harlow. Anything you ask,” I told her.
She squeezed my hand. “I can’t get the image of Dad talking to her out of my head. He was so gentle and sweet. Kiro is never sweet. Thinking about it just makes my heart hurt all over again.”
“Tell me what I can do to distract you and I will. I can sing pretty damn good, but I suck at telling jokes so that’s all I have to work with at the moment.”
Harlow smiled but she didn’t say anything. She just kept staring at me, making it hard on me to keep my eyes on the road.
When I pulled onto a long stretch of road, I was relieved that I would be able to look at her more often. It was too damn tempting not to. Before I could glance her way, Harlow leaned over and slid her hands between my legs. My entire body went still and my focus was shot to hell. I gripped the steering wheel with both hands and took a steady breath. Her mouth was at my ear before I could form words and her hand was rubbing my instantly hard dick through my jeans.
“Pull over,” she said before pressing a kiss to my neck, then taking a lick. Holy motherfucking shit. What was she doing?
“Harlow, baby, what are you doing?” I asked. I knew she was trying to find something to take her mind off today’s traumatic events, but I wasn’t sure this was the right thing to do. Even though my dick disagreed with me.
“I need you to make me forget today,” she said in a husky whisper.
Oh hell. This was a bad idea, but her hand felt so f**king good. I decided pulling off the road may not be a bad idea. At least then I could focus on controlling myself and talking to her. I pulled the car off the road.
Harlow leaned over in her seat. I thought she had changed her mind until I saw her unbuttoning her jeans and pulling them down her legs, along with the panties I’d already seen once today.
I was frozen in shock until she crawled over the seat and straddled me and lifted her shirt to pull out her br**sts from their confinement. “Are you going to make me beg?” she asked as she sat there, looking at me.
Beg? What had I been going to say to her? I couldn’t remember. “Harlow, I don’t think this is what you really want,” I managed to get out.
“Please. Don’t tell me what I want or need. I am tired of people deciding what I need. I’m a grown woman and right now I need you to help me forget. Give me something else to think about.”