She didn't want my apology. What was upsetting her then?
"You can come back to work tomorrow," I told her.
"I don't think I'm ready for that yet," she replied.
She wasn't ready for it? Today she'd tried several times to go back to work. What had changed?
"Why do you think you're not ready? Did you have another episode today?"
She shook her head. "No, I think it's just too much on me right now. I need to get a better grip on myself first." She turned and looked up at me. "Let's not talk about it tonight. I want to cook you dinner and enjoy being with you."
I tucked my head in the curve of her neck. "Okay," I replied. We would talk about it tomorrow then. "How can I help you with dinner?"
She turned and kissed my head. "You can slice the French bread, butter it, then sprinkle it with garlic powder. I need to toast it."
"I can do that," I said, stepping back from Della and reaching for the bread.
Della
I had known deep down that this wouldn't be forever. I'd thought once Woods realized how impossible life would be with me that he would end it. But that wasn't true. He was already tired of dealing with my being "crazy," but he'd never let me know. He made me feel cherished. If I hadn't heard him talking to Jace I would still have been holding on to the belief that we could work through it all.
Years of not living among other people had hindered my ability to read them. Jace had known that Woods was tired of dealing with me but I hadn't gotten the hint. I knew now. Tonight would be it for us. I had cooked for him and enjoyed looking at him and listening to him talk. I wanted to etch every moment of tonight in my memory.
When I left tomorrow, that would be it. I wasn't coming back and Woods would be relieved. At first he would be upset. I thought he loved me. I was just more than he'd bargained for. When he realized I'd taken myself out of the picture for him, his life would get easier. He could be free of worrying about me.
Tonight, though, he was still mine. I could hold him and believe in what we had. Just once more.
We stood side by side and cleaned up the dishes. Normally we talked and laughed but I couldn't find anything fun to talk about. My heart was too heavy.
"Are you okay?" Woods asked when he put the last dish in the dishwasher and closed it.
I nodded and smiled.
He reached over and laced his fingers through mine. "Are you sure? I'll fix whatever is wrong if you just tell me," he said, gently tugging me to him. He was a fixer. He wanted to fix my life, and that wasn't possible.
Instead of answering, I stood up on my tiptoes and pressed my lips to his neck. "I want you," I whispered against his warm skin . "Right now, all I want is you."
Woods let me kiss down his neck, and when I tugged at his T-shirt he lifted his arms and let me take it off. His chiseled chest was always tanned and perfect. I ran my fingers over the beautiful skin and each hard ab muscle that fascinated me. This had been mine for a time. It would be a chapter in my life that was hard to look back on, yet it would be my favorite.
I pressed my lips to the taut skin of his lower stomach and started undoing his jeans. He stood there and let me. I was glad there was no resistance or questions. If we were ending this chapter tonight, I wanted it to be perfect.
I pulled his jeans down with his boxer briefs.
"Fuck, Della," he whispered as I licked the tip of his cock. Both of his hands were now buried in my hair as I lowered myself to my knees in front of him. I wanted him to know I loved him. When I was gone I wanted him to know that he was a part of me. That this hadn't been empty for me.
"Oh, hell," he groaned, leaning back against the counter for support as I sank his length into my mouth until it slid into my throat. I loved the way this made him feel. Knowing the trembling in his legs was because of me was a wonderful feeling. He made me tremble all the time. I liked making him tremble in return.
"That's so damn good, baby. Your hot little mouth is f**king perfect." His voice was husky and deep. I reached up and cupped his balls in my hand. He let out a low growl and suddenly I was being jerked up. "Not gonna come in your mouth. Not tonight. I want inside you," he said, kicking off his jeans and leaving them on the floor before picking me up and walking to the bedroom.
His hands were on my shorts, jerking them off. I raised my arms and let him pull my top off. My bra and panties went just as quickly.
"You're beautiful," he said as he knelt above me and stared down at my body.
When I was with him I felt beautiful. "Make love to me," I told him as I opened my thighs and reached up to pull him down to me.
"I want to taste you," he said, stopping me from pulling him down farther.
"I want you inside me," I replied.