“It is,” I assured her, then wiped my hands on a towel and went to pick up the Corona I had fixed for her. “Here, drink up. The enchiladas are almost finished. I need to flip the quesadillas, and they need a few more minutes. We should be ready to eat soon.”
She took the beer and slowly put it to her lips. This was her first time with beer. She didn’t spit it out, which was a good sign.
“I’m hoping you eat Mexican,” I said, as I pulled the enchiladas out of the oven. What I really hoped was that this was good. I hadn’t made enchiladas in a while. I even had to Google some recipes to make sure I got it right.
“I love Mexican food,” she said, still smiling. “I will admit I’m really impressed that you can cook it.”
Good. I wanted to impress her tonight. Convince her that I wasn’t an ass**le. I looked up at her and winked. “I got all kinds of talents that would blow your mind.”
Her cheeks flushed, and she took a larger gulp of the Corona. I was making her nervous. I didn’t mean to do that. It was easy to forget that Blaire wasn’t used to flirting.
“Easy, girl. You gotta eat something, too. When I said drink up, I didn’t mean for you to gulp it down,” I told her, not wanting her to get drunk or sick.
She nodded and wiped the drop of beer that had clung to her lips.
All I could think about was licking it off for her. How plump and smooth her bottom lip felt under my tongue. I had to look away. My food was going to f**king burn.
I had already made the tacos and burritos, so I moved the quesadillas to the platter I had put the others on. There was no way we were going to eat all this. I’d gone overboard, but I wasn’t sure what she liked, and I wanted her to enjoy her meal. My need to watch her eat was quickly feeling like an addiction.
“Everything else is on the table already. Grab me a Corona out of the fridge, and follow me,” I told her, moving to the table with the platter. I headed for the balcony outside. At first, I had disliked this idea, because she’d seen me out here once before on a date, and I didn’t want that image in her head. But the waves and the Gulf breeze made everything seem more intimate. I just hoped she wasn’t thinking about me f**king another woman the whole time we were out here.
“Sit. I’ll fix your plate,” I said.
She nodded and sat on the chair nearest to the door. I could see the surprise in her eyes, and I liked that this wasn’t something she expected. I wanted her thoughts on us. No one else. My past was just that—my past. Besides, if she only knew just who I’d been fantasizing about that night when I’d been on this porch with Anya . . .
I fixed her plate and set it down in front of her. Then I leaned down to her ear so I could smell her, because it was driving me crazy . “Can I get you another drink?” I asked, needing a reason for inhaling her neck.
She shook her head no.
I forced myself to move to the other side of the table. I fixed my plate and looked up at her. “If you hate it, don’t tell me. My ego can’t handle it.”
She took a bite of the enchilada. The flicker in her eyes told me she was pleased. I felt like sighing in relief. I hadn’t f**ked it up. “It’s delicious, and I can’t say I’m surprised,” she told me.
I decided to try it out myself. Grinning, I started eating and watched as she relaxed and took another drink of her beer before eating some more. Each time she took a bite, I fought the urge to stop and watch. It was sick, really. She was just f**king eating. Why was I so completely obsessed with her eating? It had to be the peanut butter’s fault. I wasn’t going to get over that anytime soon.
We ate in silence. I didn’t want to interrupt her, since she looked like she was enjoying herself. When she leaned back and took a long drink from her bottle, then set it down, I knew she was finished.
“I’m sorry about how Nan treated you today,” I told her. It wasn’t enough. Nan owed her an apology, but nothing I could do would get her an apology from Nan.
“How did you know about that?” Blaire asked, shifting nervously in her seat.
“Woods called me. He was warning me that Nan would be asked to leave the next time she was rude to an employee,” I explained. I hated making him look like a damn hero, but it was the truth, and I wasn’t going to add any lies to the ones already between us.
Blaire nodded. She didn’t seem overly impressed, which was good. I didn’t like her having any feelings at all where Woods was concerned.
“She shouldn’t have spoken to you that way. I’ve had a talk with her. She promised me it wouldn’t happen again. But if it does somewhere else, then please come tell me,” I told her, which wasn’t the exact truth. Nan had promised me nothing. But my warning had been enough. I knew that.
Disappointment flashed in Blaire’s eyes, and she stood up. “Thank you. I appreciate the gesture. It was very nice of you. I assure you that I don’t intend to tattle to Woods if Nan is rude to me in the future. He just happened to witness it firsthand today.” She picked up her drink. “Dinner was lovely. Nice to have after a long day at work. Thank you so much.” She wouldn’t look at me as she turned and hurried inside.
Shit. What did I say wrong? I stood up and followed her inside. Tonight was not ending like this. I was going crazy. Blaire had to stop throwing me so completely off my tracks. I did this as an apology because of my ass**le behavior last night and because I wanted to do something for her. Take care of her.
She was washing off her plate in the sink, and the slump in her shoulders broke me.
“Blaire,” I said, caging her body against the counter. Her smell filled my head, and I had to close my eyes to keep from getting light-headed. Fuck, that was good. “This wasn’t an attempt to apologize for Nan. It was an attempt to apologize for me. I’m sorry about last night. I lay in bed all night wishing you were there with me. Wishing I hadn’t pushed you away. I push people away, Blaire. It’s a protective mechanism for me. But I don’t want to push you away.” I didn’t know how else to explain this to her.
She leaned back against me some, and I took that as my green light.
I moved away the hair brushing her shoulder and pressed a kiss to the warm, soft skin there. “Please. Forgive me. One more chance, Blaire. I want this. I want you.”