Those stupid f**king pictures. I shouldn’t have let them take those. I had witnessed firsthand how pictures like those had almost ended Jax and Sadie’s relationship. “She’s a friend.”
“Oh” was all she said.
“Please come downstairs and talk to me,” I pleaded, sliding a hand around her waist.
She tensed at first, then seemed to melt back into me.
“Okay,” she finally said after a moment.
I didn’t take my hand off her this time for fear she’d decide to run again. We made it downstairs and I directed her to the closest sofa to get her comfortable.
She looked around the place. “It’s nice down here,” she said.
It was where Jax and I had hung out when we were younger. He had been limited to our small portion of the beach when we visited, so we had spent a lot of time down here playing video games and pool.
“I haven’t been down here in a while,” I admitted.
She glanced down at her hands, then finally up at me. “So, you want to visit me,” she said slowly, as if trying to understand what I had been saying.
“Yeah, I do. A relationship would be impossible, but that doesn’t mean we can’t still date. I can come visit. I can bring you to visit me if you want to. I just . . . This thing with us not talking sucks. I miss you.”
Chapter Nineteen
JESS
A relationship would be impossible. That’s all I heard. Everything else he said didn’t make sense. What was it he wanted? A booty call?
“So you just want to hook up when you’re available and do what? Have sex?” I asked bitterly.
His eyes went wide and he shook his head. “No! God, no. That’s not what I mean. I meant just . . . date. The sex, well, yeah, it’s amazing, but that isn’t what I came here for. I wanted to see you.”
Just not in a relationship. He wanted to be free to go on dates with Star and whatever A-lister came his way and also come see me. Yes, this pissed me off, but it shouldn’t have. He never promised me anything. Just because I wanted more didn’t mean he had to. He liked me. He wanted to date me. I was used to the possessive-type guys who wouldn’t share, so casually dating wasn’t something I had done much of.
Seeing him with other women would hurt. But was it worth it to have him, even if only for a little while? Could I do that? Maybe I needed to. Maybe it was time I learned how to date different people, to leave my options open. It wasn’t like I was looking for marriage and babies.
“Okay,” I finally said. This would probably come back to haunt me, but I wasn’t willing to let him go.
A slow smile spread across his entirely too handsome face. He’d gotten what he wanted: me and whoever else. I guess he had something to smile about.
“Okay. You’re open to seeing me when we can? And we can talk on the phone,” he added.
I was going to the long-distance-nonrelationship-while-in-college place. That made me sound weak. For giving in to something like this. It was as if I had settled for less. But I wasn’t ready to let him go. Not yet. Maybe soon I would be, but I wanted Jason Stone. Damn him.
His gaze dropped to my feet. “You’re wearing the boots I bought you,” he said with a pleased grin.
I nodded and swung the leg out that I had crossed. “Yep.”
His eyes trailed up my legs and stopped to spend extra time on the tops of my thighs. I was dressed like a hooker. I knew it. I had done it out of stupidity. Of course he was looking.
“I’ll wear more clothes the next time,” I told him, trying to make a joke out of it.
His gaze jerked back to meet mine. “Sorry. I was, uh . . .”
“You were checking out my short skirt. I know. I was in a mood tonight.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “And that mood would be to see how insane you can drive every male you come in contact with?”
I shrugged and leaned back on the sofa. “Pretty much,” I replied honestly.