“Well excuse me if strange souls showing up in my house, talking to me and touching me freak me out a little.” I shot him an accusatory look. “Then, I ask you about it and you curse into the darkness and get all angry.” He walked over and sat down at the end of my bed. “I’m sorry about that. I shouldn’t have scared you that way.” There was no mistaking the concerned tone of his voice.
“Well, can you tell me what is happening, who she is?” I asked. He shook his head and immediately turned his gaze away from me.
“No, that’s the only thing I can’t do for you. Ask me anything else in the world, Pagan, and I’ll make sure it’s yours but that I cannot do.” his voice sounded intense and pained at the same time. It disappointed me but I knew pushing the subject was pointless.
“Why are you here, then?” I asked remembering how less than an hour ago I’d left him in a corner booth with Kendra curled up against his side. He stood up and walked over to the window and stared outside.
“Until I know everything is fine…until I take care of what must be done, I’ll be spending the nights here in your room.” He turned back to me with a determined expression. “I have to protect you.” He motioned toward the door. “If you want to take that shower, I’ll make sure you’re completely safe while you do so.”
Heck yes, I wanted that shower. I started to get up and then sat back down, glaring at him. “Can you read my mind?” This wasn’t the first time he’d known what I was thinking.
He grinned wickedly at me. “Not exactly. It’s more like I can feel your fears so strongly I can hear them.” I nodded and thought of the time he’d chuckled where only I could hear him, as if he’d heard me in the cafeteria thinking about him and Kendra.
I stared back at him. “You heard me in the cafeteria when you were with Kendra, I wasn’t scared then.” He raised his eyebrows slightly. “You weren’t?” My face grew warm and I turned and left the room before he could see me blush.
I started to close the bathroom door when I turned and looked at the walls knowing a soul could come in at any time.
I stared back down the hall where Dank lay lounging on my bed. He couldn’t see the soul if she came into the bathroom.
His head turned immediately toward me. A slow wicked smile formed on his mouth.
“I would love to accompany you into the bathroom while you shower and if I were truly as wicked as you think I am, I would do just that. However, I can feel any soul intent on entering this house before they even come inside. I would be there before any other entered. You’re safe with me right here,” he finished with a wink. I closed the door quickly before he said anything else to embarrass me.
* * * *
I slipped on a pair of cut-off sweat pants and a tank top instead of my usual night gown. If I was going to have company while I slept, I needed to wear clothes. My heart raced at the thought of Dank being in my bedroom, on my bed and I took several deep breaths to calm my thoughts and emotions.
“Pagan, honey, are you in the bathroom?” Mom called from the hallway. I opened the door and glanced past her to the bed where Dank still lay lounging.
“She can’t see or hear me. Calm down.” I looked back to my mother, who stood, smiling in the doorway. “Did you have a good time with Leif?”
“Yes, we won the game and went out with Miranda and Wyatt afterwards to the Grill. It was nice.” I said thinking of his kissing me and once again my mind went back to the incredibly sexy nonhuman male in my room, who I couldn’t seem to keep out of my head.
Mom laughed. “Nice, huh? Poor kid, he hasn’t got a clue you’re one hard nut to crack. Ah, well, that’s good for now.
One day, the right guy will come along and you’ll be so swept away, you won’t be able to see straight. Enjoy the others until then.” She kissed my cheek and headed toward her room.
As I stepped into my room, I stared down at what appeared to be a sleeping Dank. I closed my bedroom door softly, not wanting to wake him. He opened his eyes and stared up at me, smiling.
“There is no chance you would let me sleep on the bed too?”
I shook my head and laughed. “No, there isn’t.” He sighed and sat up, “I’d already guessed as much but I was hoping for a moment of pity from the ‘hard nut’.” I frowned, hating that he’d heard my mother. I really didn’t want Dank to know I wasn’t completely in love with Leif. It was better that way. I went to my closet in search of the sleeping bag I’d bought to go camping last summer.
“I don’t sleep Pagan, I was teasing you.” I turned around and frowned. “Okay, I guess that makes sense...for normal souls. They don’t have bodies but you do, then you don’t. It’s like you can just choose if you want to be human or soul. That isn’t normal, is it?” I asked, not sure exactly how any of this worked. The one thing I knew was that it did not work the way I’d always been taught. Sunday School had it all wrong.
He chuckled and sat down on the love seat beside my window. “I’m not a soul, per se. That’s all you can know.” He reached for the guitar I hadn’t noticed standing in the corner behind the chair.
“Go to sleep, Pagan. You’re safe and you need rest.” He began strumming on the guitar and I turned to my bed and pulled back the covers before slipping inside. The lights went out and I glanced over at Dank.
“No need to sleep with the lights on. I can see either way,” he explained. I nodded and forced myself to close my eyes. I wanted to ask more questions but I knew he wasn’t going to answer them tonight. The sound of the music began to soothe me. Dank’s low voice joined the guitar and I got lost in the sound and the safety of his presence...
“You weren’t meant for the ice, you weren’t made for the pain.
The world that lives inside of me was not the world you were meant to contain.
You were meant for castles and living in the sun. The cold running through me should have made you run.
Yet you stay. Holding onto me, yet you stay, reaching out a hand that I push away. The cold is not meant for you yet you stay, you stay, you stay. When I know it’s not right for you.