Jax took the tray from my hand and handed it to Marcus. I hadn’t realized he was standing there. Marcus took it with a concerned frown on his face. I gave him a small smile, hoping to ease his worry.
“Come with me,” Jax said in a voice only loud enough for me to hear.
I let him lead me down the hall and into the room I knew as the library. He closed the door, and then turned me around to face him.
“Are you all right?” he asked in a concerned voice. Chill bumps covered my arms.
I nodded. “I’m fine, really. Marcus warned me something like this might happen. I came mentally prepared.”
Jax muttered what seemed to be a curse and pulled me over to a large leather chair. “You shouldn’t have been serving tonight. I don’t know what Mary was thinking.”
His words stung. I immediately felt the need to defend Ms. Mary as well as myself. “I am a very hard worker and I believe she entrusted me to serve and follow instructions well. I don’t see how it is her fault some jerk thought I was on the menu as well.”
Jax gazed down at me confused, and then grinned. He stepped over and sat down beside me. “I didn’t mean I thought you were not capable of serving. I meant you’re too young and too beautiful to be flaunted in front of guys who think they have enough money and power to take what they want.”
My throat went dry at his words.
He smiled and leaned over and asked in a soft voice, “Do you know you’re beautiful?”
I swallowed, hoping my dry throat allowed the words through without making me sound all choked up. “I wouldn’t say ‘beautiful.’ I realize I have nice hair and eyes. I got those from my mother. But I don’t have a good personality. So it really takes away from the others.” My words sounded stupid being said aloud, but I realized I managed to bare my soul to this boy yet again. The power Jax held over me disturbed me.
Jax smiled and took one of my loose curls and played with it absently. “So your personality is bad, is it?” He laughed then, and I stiffened. He traced my cheekbones and the bridge of my nose. “I hate to be the first to break the news to you, but your personality happens to be your most charming asset.”
I searched for any sign in his perfect face telling me he didn’t mean what he said. “I can’t believe you said that.” I finally heard myself say.
He touched his finger to my lips. “I think these rank right up there next to your personality.”
A warm tingly sensation worked its way through my veins, and I shivered.
“Ah, and you go, do something as enchanting as shivering, and almost break my resolve.”
He dropped his hands from my face and stopped doing those incredibly wonderful things to me. He stood, walked over to a bookshelf, and leaned up against it as if he were posing for a camera. “I can be good over here. This is safer territory.” I frowned, and he gave me a guilty smile. “You tempt me, Sadie White. You’re sweet, honest, caring, perfectly unique, and because of all those reasons, I am keeping my distance from you.”
I frowned unsure why all of those things meant he needed to keep me at a distance.
“Sadie, I have always got what I wanted. Even before I became rich and famous, I had a gift for getting what I want. Now, I have the fame and fortune to get what I want when I want it and for the first time in my life, I want something I can’t have.” He gave me a sad smile. “For the first time, the object of what I want is more important than fulfilling my desires.” Before I could form words to reply, he opened a drawer and pulled out several magazines and laid them in front of me. “These are from my mother’s collection,” he explained.
They were pictures of him with movie stars, rock legends, and even the president. His name was linked with several famous females, and his personal life laid bare for everyone to see. I had seen articles like these before, but after actually meeting Jax and finding a real person, it seemed hard to think of him as the rock star the media portrayed.
“See these,” he said with a grimace. “My life isn’t normal. There is no room for me to have a friendship, or any relationship, with someone like you. I want to spend more time with you, and to be honest, friendship isn’t really what I want anymore when it comes to you. I find myself wanting much more, but any girl who enters into a relationship with me has to be cold to put up with the life I am forced to live.” He smiled and walked toward me. “You’re everything I write about in my songs, but can never have.”
I studied the pictures in my lap. It was easier than watching him say things I didn’t want to hear. Even if he was right. If I spent more time with him, I would want more, too, and I didn’t know the guy in those photos. He was someone completely foreign to me. I just knew Jax. The sweet guy who wanted to go into a grocery store and buy himself a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup and took the time to be kind to little girls. I’d never be able to fit into his real world. I wanted to disagree, but I couldn’t. He lived in a world I could never fit into, and I couldn’t make myself protest.
He stepped forward and stopped in front of me. “There will be transportation for you out front within moments. Ms. Mary will be given directions to let you leave for the evening. Wipe the frown from your pretty face because, by now, she knows what happened, and she will be worried about you.”
He stepped around me and went to the door. “Stay here as long as you need. I have a room full of guests wondering what I am doing with the gorgeous blond I abducted.” He grinned wickedly at me, and immediately it faded to a sad frown before he left the room.
* * *
Chapter Six
Everything stayed the same. Ms. Mary still gave me a smile and a hot breakfast every morning. Mr. Greg told me stories of his time in World War II and beat me at chess most days. Marcus and I still talked on our way home at night. I even went waterskiing and knee boarding with Marcus, Preston, Rock, Trisha, and Dwayne on Sunday. But even with new friends and a job with people I really cared about, my life seemed to be missing something. There was a void, and I knew why. The frustrating part was I missed him. I’d forced myself to come to grips with the fact I’d lost my heart to Jax Stone the night in the grocery store. The night in the library when he admitted to having an interest in me put another nail in my coffin. I loved Jax. He starred in my dreams both day and night. My heart raced at the chance of a glimpse of him. His words haunted me. Those times when I couldn’t believe Jax would ever notice me enough to want me. I remembered the sadness in his eyes when he walked out the door, and I really believed he meant it.
Nothing changed the fact I worked in his home. He signed my paychecks. If nothing else but for those two reasons, anything between Jax and I would be impossible. Yet those weren’t the only two. I would never fit into his world.
I sat out on the beach, waiting for Marcus to finish his shift so he could take me home. Mr. Greg left early due to his not feeling well. It left me with nothing to do. I pulled my knees up under my chin and enjoyed the view. The waves were smooth tonight. I let myself think about Jax and his face when he smiled. It helped to remember him smiling and happy, instead of the expression on his face when he left me in the library. It was depressing enough to be a Shakespearean tragedy. The girl who never thought she would fall in love falls for the guy who can never love her back. Somehow, the fact I sat here comparing my life to Shakespeare proved just how badly I’d fallen.
Footsteps drew my attention out of my Jax-centered thoughts, and I realized Marcus must be finished. I didn’t turn around. I stayed put and waited until he stopped behind me. “Beautiful view, isn’t it?”